Happy Monday! I thought about you guys so much the past two weeks that I actually considered switching this to a weekly newsletter, but in lieu of my most recent article about cleansing my brain and not getting overwhelmed, we shall (for now) continue to meet for coffee bi-weekly. But truly, every single little thing I ate, every product I tried, every random opinion I had…I simply couldn’t wait to share here with you all!

On a different note that might feel a bit disconnected from my usual topics, I want this newsletter to feel like a discussion related space for things that are probably on many of our minds, and even since we talked last two weeks ago, the power of AI continues to snowball further and further down the hill and into everyones mouth. You can’t really look at anyones screen anymore without seeing a tab with this little icon friend waving to you.

Don’t worry- as someone who has worked almost exclusively in technology and product management (surrounded mainly by friends and peers who are engineers) for the majority of my post-grad existence, I can tell you with the boldest strokes of confidence that this newsletter will never be centered around artificial intelligence, or how to optimize life or dining or habits with artificial intelligence.

But I also think that the past week alone, I’ve had more conversations with friends around how people are utilizing it than I have probably in my entire lifetime. I was over at my friend’s apartment on Friday night for pizza and wine with three of my friends and we each talked about how we were using AI in our jobs and our daily lives. It came up completely naturally and each one of us were using it in completely different, like polar opposite different ways.

My other two friends and I (who also write on Substack) were voice memoing back and forth about how we were feeling grateful for creative hobbies that we could do with our hands in this day of automation, but then talked about how very successful writers on here will rise to success with their abilities to train models, instead of putting pen to paper. And I’ve always stated how I will never use artificial intelligence to write an article- like surely people could tell if I used AI, but the scary thing is guys- you really can’t tell anymore. These things are getting damn good. Even in our cozy creative spaces. And I’m not saying that it’s necessarily negative, but it’s certainly a very fast and competitive shift.

Anyways- even to this day I have not used AI for any writing, but I’m bringing all of this up because the recent developments of what Claude (and many many other tools) can do and do well is something I want to better understand from a community perspective…

…Are you scared? Excited? Do you use it every single day? Do you never use it? What are the things you do use it on? How do you all feel about people now fully producing all of their Substack content using it? Because every person in my life has a completely and totally different answer to these questions. So leave a comment if you feel like sharing! Especially if you’re using it in a way that has boosted your quality of life.

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And now, in completely other news….

Crumbs Card Winner of the Week!

I’m excited to announce that are the Vol 2 winners of the $150 Crumbs Card, which, this week, is $150 to Red Hook Tavern which was recommended twice in the last 14 days by other Crumbs readers as both a top burger and warmer-weather spot!

As mentioned in my first article, look out for a dining buddy pair in your inbox to enjoy this with :) - totally optional and always confidential unless you decide to be connected

Crumbs Community Chat- bi-weekly recommendations

My favorite threads, summarized from your incredible crowdsourced recommendations! All of these will also be living in a searchable tool to be accessed 24/7 very soon on my paid members hub on my website!

Best burger you’ve ever had in NYC: Pastis · Red Hook Tavern · Rolo’s · The Lions · Virginia’s · Inga’s Bar · Fairfax · Joseph Leonard · Peter Luger · Skinny Louie · Cozy Royale

Where to order a birthday cake in NYC: Tipsy & Baked · From Lucie · Saint Street · Gaby Scelzo · Isabella’s Cakes & Pastries · Lady M

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I awoke one stop before my stop for the evening, which was Carroll street, a stop that was the final physical barrier between me and one of the most magical neighborhoods in New York. It was around 6pm, my mission was to acquire a bottle of procescco to contribute to spritz-making, and I was window shopping all of the quirky boutiques on Court Street wondering how they’ve stayed open as long as they have.

I’ve actually walked up and down Court street probably over twenty times now in my five years living in New York, but realized this was my first time even seeing Yesterday’s News in the wild, as I had only ever seen videos of it on Instagram. And that folks, is the reason I decided to write any of this.

I’ve spent too much time looking down at a screen. The second my phone gains service again after rising up from the depths of the Subway, I’m on it. I’m on it when I walk. I’m on it when I talk. I can’t even imagine how much ~goodness I’ve missed that is living and breathing around me in my favorite neighborhoods.

I’m still also trying to understand how I let myself even shut my eyes briefly on the Subway, and I think it’s because, for once, I wasn’t fighting Verizon for one bar of service at each stop to hope Instagram finally refreshed.

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January and February brought me to my peak impatience. I had never been so irritable in my lifetime. Very self aware of my irritability, but still very irritable. I’d open all conversations and plans with my friends warning them with a text before saying that “I might be in a weird mood”, secretly kicking myself and muttering frustrated epithets under my breath for even making plans with anyone other than my cats to begin with.

The type of plans you’re so mad you made a week ago but then end up being exactly what you needed. And this, in no way, is specific to any person. This was very much a ~me thing of getting annoyed that I’d even have to speak to the barista about my cold brew with oat milk.

Normal, very minimal tasks were making me feel burnt out, which led to me ordering an all time high amount of food delivery and writing absolutely zero words on Substack to the point where I’d type a note and delete it because I didn’t feel like editing a one sentence, cheeky phrase with a few photos. I’d never felt worse about my appearance. I walked out of the salon crying because I was so distressed over the fact that I had lost two hours to hair color. And pretty much anyone reading these words right now would probably just think I was struggling with depression and anxiety, which maybe I was, but I actually rack all of this up to the very peak of phone addiction.

Because phone addiction isn’t something we go to rehab for yet, it’s hard to understand why extreme irritability and loss of patience and serotonin could be so directly related. I remember reading ‘s Your Phone is Why You Don’t Feel Sexy a year ago, resonating with every single thing that she said, and knowing damn well I wasn’t going to actually take her advice of getting rid of my iPhone.

Now, a year later, I still have my iPhone, in fact I actually create and produce content at a much more frequent scale than I did a year ago. But after my phone got stolen in Brazil (leading me to leave Instagram behind for 10 days), I realized pretty much all of it was to blame for my extreme frustrations with my daily routine.

So nothing about this is heroic like it was for Catherine who physically decided to cut off access to her phone. Mine just happened to be stolen. But the level of deep cleaned that my brain felt after losing most access to the doom scroll was something I’m now obsessed with maintaining in the same routine I was hating two months ago, and wanted to share with anyone who was also at peak irritability and lack of attention and lust for life.

This is for my people who helplessly have 754 unopened texts on their phone and don’t know ‘why they’re like this’ and don’t know where to start.

1. I never leave the house with social media

I think the thing that made this rule feel really necessary for me was the fact that every time I’d go and see friends, someone would walk away to go to the bathroom for a few minutes, or I’d have a 10 minute walk alone to meet someone at the train, and the first and only thing that I’d do is pull out my phone and check social media. In the most literal and figurative way possible, I would never really look up on any walk, subway ride, uber backseat, moment alone at the table (as I talked about in my intro)…

I post a lot on social media. I need to- it’s essentially part of my job. But. I now do not leave the house with social media. I not only Brick my phone, but the only phone that has cellular service on it is the old temporary iPhone that I got as a replacement when my phone got stolen, so my actual phone stays home, and I bring this temporary phone with me everywhere. Even if I wanted to un-brick it and download social media, it has such little storage that I’d have to delete Spotify to even use Instagram without crashing, so it’s the perfect way to still be able to call/text my friends, but stay fully offline and present.

If I post something on social media, I post it in the morning and then Brick my phone for the remainder of the day. No sense in obsessively watching views because all of that stuff is purely out of your control, anyway.

I’m not suggesting you buy a second temporary phone, but they’re pretty inexpensive and at the very least you should Brick your actual phone every time you leave the house.

Because I also love being home, I have cut offs where I have to be awake for at least two hours before checking social media, and it needs to be inaccessible at least an hour before bed. You guys should see my sleep score on Oura now…..

2. I’m falling in love with TV and movies

Every single time any of my friends mention a TV show or a movie reference, I’ve literally never seen it. I used to feel high and mighty because I was a self proclaimed “non TV person” and always touted around the fact that I just never had time for it. But the truth is, a good movie or TV show is actually incredible for intellect and inspiration. How the fuck did I ever think I was “romanticizing my life” without watching a TV show based in late 90s or early 2000s New York City?

I’m not telling you to deep clean your brain by watching TV. What I’m telling you to do is get off of your phone while you’re watching TV and actually fall in love with a good plot and cast and not be scrolling the entire time you’re watching. My friends got me watching Girls on HBO and I have never been more excited to watch my nightly episode and lust for 2000s Greenpoint and the lives of the Girls who are going through so many of the same things I’m going through in my twenties. If I do pick up my phone after watching, it’s because I’m reading Reddit threads psychoanalyzing each character and underlying episode meanings. It feels awesome to be this excited by a good show again.

3. I have serotonin days

I know the whole point of mind-cleansing is to remove serotonin overloads from your brain, but the whole point of the way I spend my days now is to remove a lot of the cheap dopamine from my brain to really enjoy what I’m now branding as a Serotonin day. The exact itinerary of a Serotonin day are as follows:

No concrete plans and no alarms. This is seemingly impossible for a busy person who wants to see their friends on the weekends (or hosts supper clubs like every other weekend like I do), but I promise you need to make the space for these. You’ll sleep in, you won’t immediatley scroll, and you’ll do a series of things that make you classically happy. You’ll get a coffee you know is good. You’ll listen to a good playlist and take the train above ground to a new stop in a new neighborhood to try a new place for lunch. You’ll shop around after, really taking your time and space getting to try things on without anyone rushing you. You’ll maybe join friends for a loose dinner plan after you’ve had time to yourself.

I had the ultimate serotonin day on Saturday. I woke up at 9:30, snuggled with my cats, took the train to Bed Stuy to meet my friend Delaney for a piece of chocolate cake for breakfast at Welcome Home (this plan was also made morning of), and then I spent the rest of the day to myself thrifting around places like I Like Mike and A Store Called Store. I took myself to lunch at Acre and ended with dinner at the brand new Catch reopening, which was both nostalgic and impeccable on so many levels.

4. I’m trying (really hard) not to be late

This one is still so much a work in progress (similar to never responding to texts) almost to the point where I can’t even claim I’ve even made any progress, but removing mindless scrolling and reducing irritability and impatience has forced me to be more on time. Even by just a couple of minutes.

I think the concept of being late and why certain people are always late is a concept to be studied, but I do feel a slightly stronger sense of control over the concept of time with a reduction in phone use.

I used to sip my coffee and catch up on social media up until 5 minutes before I had to leave, every single time, knowing damn well there was no possible way I could do my makeup and find an outfit in five minutes. I’m still not as much as a morning person as I’d like and I’m trying incredibly hard to stick to a true routine, but I do think being on time is a sign of mental clarity and stability, so consider this one a work in progress.

(And yes, to all of my friends who saw me 15 minutes late last weekend, this is a work in progress)

5. Playing cards!

My boyfriend brought a pack of cards with us on our last vacation and kept asking every day if we could bring them to the beach or to dinner and I kept shutting down the idea. Realistically speaking, the last time I played a card game was in highschool when my then-boyfriend dragged me to all of his poker matches and I was stuck in the back with all of the pitiful partners playing war, which I don’t even remember how to play.

Everything changed, however, when one of our perfect beach days in Uruguay turned into pouring rain, sweatshirts, and negronis at 3pm, and he taught me how to play Durak, a Russian card game that translates to ‘fool’, and let’s just say playing this card game (and beating him in this card game) suddenly became more of a priority than the sun that finally came out the next morning.

My best friend also sent me this text this week because we’d hope and pray for a rainy day at the beach when we were kids to be able to play Mancala literally day and night. Anyone in New York want to play Mancala?

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Happy MONDAY! Welcome to the very first issue of Cafe Crumbs, a newsletter meant to be enjoyed as your bi-weekly whimsy with a coffee in hand. (Or perhaps a decaf tea because my type B already missed our Monday morning deadline).

I’m so excited to finally have a cozy home for all the incredible things happening in this community!

I want to use this newsletter as a space for my paid subscribers to highlight all of your thoughtful and special crowdsourced recommendations that you kindly share with all of us in the chat, feature a mini-interview with member of the community (there are SO many incredible people in Club Crumbs that I needed a place to show them off!!!), share my bi-weekly hyperfixations and recs, and a little bit about my most recent dinner party with some decor + food links to inspire you to host more! But before we really dive in….

…Introducing: the Crumbs Card

No don’t worry, it’s not a weird new credit card or anything that I’m suddenly trying to brand. (Could you actually imagine if I tried to come out with my own credit card)

Starting this issue, every two weeks I’m going to gift a paid member who helped recommend something in the chat a $150 gift card to a restaurant that was also recommended that week. I might even pair you with someone else in the community I think you should meet- a little friend dinner date on me. Don’t worry though, I’ll disclose this in email, not publicly.

The recs you guys send as replies in the daily chat are genuinely so thoughtful + produced purely out of the love of community, and I want to reward and connect more of you for sharing!

And as a note, if we end up loving this, I’ll invest more into a full on friend dinner date program outside of just my Club Crumbs events because so many of you would get along beautifully. But for now….

Crumbs Community Chat- bi-weekly recommendations

My favorite threads, summarized from your incredible crowdsourced recommendations! All of these will also be living in a searchable tool to be accessed 24/7 very soon on my paid members hub on my website!

The best stickers & junk journaling supplies: Greenwich Letterpress · Loaf on Paper · Niconecca Zakaya · Art Box at Hmart LIC

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But today is my very last day of this 10 (that has become an 11) day adventure, so let me fast forward and take you all the way back to day 1.

For some initial context, (and I don’t mean to say this in a snotty way), but I’ve honestly had really great travel luck. I guess two years ago I was stuck in an earthquake in Morocco, that happened to be the first (and very seismic) earthquake that they had in the last 10,000 years, plus a few stomach bugs and lost bags here and there. But never anything that’s ever made me look back on a trip and feel like it just ~wasn’t the best trip ever. I always leave thinking my trip was the best trip ever. Usually can’t shut up about it for months to come. And this trip still was the best trip ever. But I’ve probably learned more on this trip than any other I’ve embarked on in my adult life.

I also have never been to South America, and Brazil and Uruguay had been both highly recommended places at the tippy-top of my bucket list for years now. Almost everyone who had been to Rio said it was their favorite place they had ever been. And if you know me at all, I’m incapable of going on a trip without visiting like 3 different places in a very short timespan, so it was decided that we were going to do Rio de Janeiro, Brazil’s Iguazu Falls in the rainforest, and then the coastal towns of Uruguay. It was already the Best Trip Ever before we even stepped foot on the plane.

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Our first day in Rio was strong, despite the clouds in the sky and the redeye hangover. A little bit of anticipated bickering here and there over the itinerary with my boyfriend due to the two hours of sleep that we got and rain we weren’t expecting, but we went to bed that night, full bellied from a decadent meal of buttery Brazilian steak from michelin-starred Sult nestled in the vibrant Botagofo neighborhood.

Day two felt different. I almost didn’t write this article because I don’t like sharing negative experiences. And then I decided to write this article without sharing any negative experiences, just my positive recommendations, but then it felt disingenuous. The exact reason people don’t trust influencers nowadays because they feel like the truth is never written in the highlight reels. So I’m deciding to share because Substack is both my diary and a community of intentional readers who read for the true, genuine recommendations and feelings…

…So alas, we started day two with a hike that went wrong from the start. We made it all the way up to the top and indulged in the man-made lookouts over the sparkling waves folding like ice cream in the sun, Sugarloaf mountain in the distance, and tropical creatures talking to us in the trees as we turned each corner.

With smiles on our faces and postcard snaps in our camera rolls, we finally made it up to the official trailhead. It was chained off by a rusty gate with a huge do-not-enter symbol that could be understood by a person of any lingual background.

After checking the map and the signs over and over, we finally accepted our fate that we weren’t doing the hike, started our descent down into the Leblon neighborhood, and turned our frowns upside down with one of the best Acai bowls at I’ve ever had in my life at Big Polis thanks to impeccable recommendations.

We grabbed a coffee at So_lo, the sun was out, and we waited to cross the street to proceed onward to the open-air market that was next on our itinerary. We didn’t end up going to the market, however. Not because it was closed or because it started raining this time.

It was the perfect seize the day energy that quite literally got seized right from me. All because we waited for the light to turn red, calmly crossed the street in the walkway, and a man on a motorcycle ran the red light into the crosswalk at full force, and ripped my phone right out of my hand.

My initial thoughts were: How can I turn back time and completely reverse that interaction and not cross that street? Ok, at least he didn’t completely run me over and have me in the hospital. What the fuck is my apple password and how can I lock every single thing on this device as fast as possible?

The short answer to all of my initial thoughts were that: turning back time in a state of shock isn’t possible and it’s still funny to me that I thought this WAS a viable possibility, I WAS able to lock all of my credit cards and accounts so all he really stole was glass and metal in the shape of a square, and the sunny day at the market turned into a cloudy one reconciling everything in our hotel room.

Like the hesitation to share places and spaces that I didn’t have a positive experience at, sharing this moment is hard for me as well. Way more traumatic things could have happened, and friends warned us about phone theft there, but I didn’t want this experience to influence anyone’s decision not to go. Brazil is a beautiful place and we do have positive memories regardless of this situation. It also does open the dumb blonde can of worms of allowing people to perceive me in a way of: of course HER phone would get stolen.

No, I was not on my phone in the middle of the street, if the phone was unlocked it would have been a different story, but I probably shouldn’t have ever had it to begin with or had it fully secure in a fanny pack (which ironically I was using all day the first day and all hike right before- I almost felt like it was overkill, but the second I had it in my hand instead of there, things went south). I think I THOUGHT in my head if it were to get stolen it would have been like out of my pocket in a crowded bar, but having it ripped out of my gripping hand is certainly plausible and especially even (more?) common?

I would just advise people to be careful with the valuables that don’t get left behind in the hotel room. All the more reason to truly disconnect from technology and rely on an old phone or just a camera. I’m just glad he didn’t actually decide to run me over with the bike, that…probably would have put a bit more of a damper on the day.

But now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, I can’t wait to tell you all of the incredible things we did that I couldn’t have loved more. I also can’t wait to tell you what my brain felt like having pretty much no access to a phone or social media for the nine days to follow.

There’s always a silver lining, so here are my best and brightest Crumbs of South America.

3.5 Days in Uruguay

Aka, the place I have never been more obsessed with going back to:

Locations: 1 night in Montevideo, 3 beach days in Jose Ignacio

Where I Stayed-

Posada Ayana (Jose Ignacio)- Two years ago I would have never picked a destination solely on a hotel- I would have convinced myself that I would never be in the room so it would be a silly waste of money, but going to a property like Posada Ayana redefines the ways in which a hotel can mold an experience. We flew into Montevideo from Buenos Aires and rented a car to drive two hours down the coast to Jose Ignacio, which the kids on Tiktok are now calling the “Hamptons of South America”.

Were there crossovers? Maybe- it is a magical coastal town that feels high end, but also…extremely laid back and barefoot. It has color and flavor that East Hampton doesn’t see as often (I hate that I’m even doing this cross reference here), both of which come alive with properties like Posada Ayana where the flat foundations of glass and wood are embellished with paintbrushes, geometry, and eclectic tiling.

Peak moments were all about sipping a white negroni at sunset by the emerald marble pool overlooking the crashing waves of Uruguay’s beaches, savoring every detail from the warm chocolate chip cookie we were greeted with, to the private tour of James Turell’s Skyspace that is on the property for stargazing.

Hotel Montevideo (Montevideo)- A stunning selection in the heart of Montevideo for maximalist interior lovers! Velvets, horses, and blue and white china and palettes that celebrate the Uruguayan flag decorate the lobby and restaurants at the hotel. We also loved our room with a balcony overlooking the urban clay tennis courts and the best water pressure I’ve ever had in a hot shower after a long travel day. Breakfast had strong coffee (randomly hard to find on this entire trip) and golden, locally sourced eggs made to order. Could not recommend more for a night or two in Montevideo.

What I did-

Night one- Montevideo

We flew into Montevideo (capital) the afternoon before we drove to the coast, so we decided to explore and have dinner in the area and instantly fell in love with the breezy and modern living that we observed around us on our stroll. Every building and moment felt clean, intentional, and private. Modern and glassy, yet also preservative of cultural roots. Corners were quiet, but not lacking in lively bistros or grills with a few sidewalk tables occupied with bottles of wine and bread until the late hours of the evening. We wished we got to explore more and tour the Andes museum and relax in one of the incredible libraries like Babilonia Libros, but had to hit the road early for our trip down the coast.

Jose Ignacio/Punte Del Este

Waking up to drive down the coast to Punta Del Este from Montevideo felt like Christmas. I also forgot how much fun it was to be a passenger princess in a rental car that my boyfriend was willing to deal with the entire trip. With caffeine in our veins and the smell of clean leather seats in our noses, we took off to the coast with a few stops along the way to Jose Ignacio.

Casapueblo

We took a pit stop at the iconic Casapueblo in Punta Del Este, about an hour from our hotel constructed by the Uruguayan artist Carlos Páez Vilaró. I had seen Vilaró’s art before, not even realizing it was him, and knew I needed to buy some and tour his home. Rainbow abstract paintings cover the white plaster walls inside and out, while large ceramics with funky, abstract faces stare up at you pull out your phone to take their photos. It felt like a home fit for a mermaid, and cats are running around the inside just as they would if he still lived there. I was in heaven. We walked away with some new canvas art and randomly the best museum jamón and cheese sandwich one could have?

Jose Ignació

We spent the majority of our stay in the breezy beach town of Jose Ignacio (where our hotel, Posada Ayana was perfectly perched). One thing about my boyfriend and I is that we struggle to relax. We always feel like we do need to be doing something productive, even on vacation, and this town sucked every last drop of that feeling out of us. I wish (but I also don’t) that I had a bunch of links of different specific spots to check out, but the truth is, you should be doing nothing other than strolling down to the beach after a dip in the pool or toweling off to enjoy grilled octopus, barefoot, at an open aire restaurant in the sand.

The biggest ‘activity’ that we did (other than eat which I will share deets on below), was take a pair of beach bikes around town and pop into the little boutiques like El Canuto and Sentido before coasting downhill to the iconic lighthouse that overlooks a rocky beach that sometimes has seals that bake in the sun (which sadly did not come out to say hello when we were there)! We had the best time just enjoying the sand, our hotel, and window shopping the coolest beach houses I’ve ever seen.

Where I ate-

La Huella

If I came back (and when I DO come back) to Jose Ignacio, I would literally eat at La Huella everyday for lunch if I had the option. On vacation, I’m big on lunch. When I’m home, lunch is irrelevant. But lunch is somehow the most special meal of the day in a beach town because it’s perfectly acceptable to enjoy the sunshine and have the same amount of cocktails that you would have at dinner….just at lunch.

Their famous parilla (grill) style menu, which is the most popular style and flavor in Uruguay, has charred octopus that was so tender I barely chewed it, and their version of sushi, (which happens to have caviar and an egg yolk) with a local white fish. We also had the mussels and the caramelized onion tart, which sort of tastes like french onion soup, but dry and more decadent. Everyone here gives barefoot energy, but also has a Birkin, if you can visualize. People watching was just as delectable as our meal- the people here, plainly put, are just beautiful. I was in a sundress with a bikini underneath (wrong), while every other girl my age was in white linen pants, fingers filled with rings, and suede jackets to make the slight chill of the wind by the coast roll off their perfect shoulders. Effortless energy everywhere.

Bliss Ayana

Another vacation rule that I usually set (unless the hotel is the vacation) is that I usually don’t eat at the hotel. Posada Ayana was different. The eggs I had for breakfast paired with a fresh baked croissant (that rivaled 4f by the way) told me everything I needed to know about how delicious dinner in their Uruguayan-Japanese restaurant could be. The vermouthy negroni immediatley warmed my insides like the fiery grill that made our short rib impeccable, which was a completely different texture of short rib that I’ve never had- Uruguay is indeed known for its extremely high quality beef.

El Abrazo

A fantastic restaurant that is a 10 minute drive further up the coast to Punta del Este, El Abrazo is a candle-lit, late dinner by the fire paradise when the sun has gone down, your nose is a little bit sunburnt, and you want to cozy up with a blanket, a glass of wine, and sit by the fireplace. Another spot that has delicious Uruguayan ojo de bief (ribeye) grilled to perfection, and one of our favorite dishes of the trip which was a poached and grilled squid in olive oil.

La Pulperia

If you do hit Montevideo, going to a classic, open air Uruguayan grill should be on your list. La Pulperia was on a quiet corner with a line out the door of people waiting to be seated, because everyone, including us, knew it was worth the wait. The interior is smoky and lively from beer drinkers and soccer on TV as locals enjoy their steaks, house salad, and freshly baked bread that lands on each table. We scored a spot outside and enjoyed one of the best steaks of my life right on the sidewalk.

2.5 days in Iguazu Falls- Brazilian Rainforest

Where I stayed-

We got to spend two nights nestled in the rainforest within a pink palace that is the Belmond Hotel Das Cataratas, right in the heart of the Brazilian side of the Iguazu Falls. The most interesting part about this hotel and location is that it practically straddles the border of three different countries- Brazil, Paraguay, and Argentina, which all have their own “side” of the rainforest’s national park and the falls.

The hotel itself is a damn spectacle. The walls are washed pink, the chairs are upholstered in leopard print, and every plate, vase, painting, or tile has a parrot or a toucan in different art forms. Breakfast is a sprawling buffet with enough fresh and local fruit to actually turn you into a parrot, and the pool, stocked with Möet based cocktails, welcomes you with a spritz or complementary acai smoothie after a day of exploring nature in the park.

Sunsets are for complimentary champagne and watching the orange and pink skies melt into the massive waterfalls of Iguazu, all of which we got to enjoy in the company of only hotel guests as the entire park closes to the public right at 5pm. And we were sure to arrive back to our hotel room with a new gift of the day neatly placed on our nightstands. One day it was custom Havanias, another it was a charm with real water from the falls, and always a brigaderio on our pillows, which is fudgiest Brazilian chocolate bon bon.

Because you are in the middle of the rainforest, we ate all meals at our hotel. They do have a michelin starred restaurant, Restaurant Y, which has classic Brazilian staples that are presented in the small plate, tasting menu format. Everything was delicious, but this was probably the only thing about our hotel that we didn’t fall in love with. It felt a little stuffy, it was very pricey, and I wanted a big steak grilled Brazilian style instead of a nibble of one. The breakfast spread, classic lunch by the pool, and more casual restaurant the second night all did the trick, though!

This hotel, simply put, is not cheap. But god damn did we get our moneys worth. The pure kindness of the staff. The park. The private access to nature. The attention to every single corner of interior detail.

I felt like a real ADULT here. Like- this was what I dreamed of being able to do when I had ‘adult money’ and could save up for months to come to a place like this. Worth every single penny.

What I did-

I explored the rainforest!

Raft tour of the falls

Because we were right IN the falls, which is literally one of the seven wonders of the world, we wanted to see all corners of the park, including from a raft boat which grazed the feet of the powerful gushing water melting over the vine tangled cliffs. Our hotel booked us Gran Aventura which is a tour that takes you by foot through the rainforest, and then down on the raft that chops up the waves of the streams beneath the falls, literally leaving you covered head to toe in pure waterfall magic. As I mentioned in my way-too-long intro, I didn’t have a phone so naturally I didn’t really get any pictures, and we decided to leave my boyfriend’s in the room as well. If I DID have a phone, I feel like I would have been trying to figure out a way to use it and not get it drenched in the waterfall, and it was a micro-moment that just felt really beautifully disconnected and present.

Moonlight tour of the falls

This part of the world just has a sky that we just do not have here in the big city. The moonlight is the street lamp and the stars are nightlights that are all bright enough to illuminate the paths of the jungle all the way down to the waterfalls.

We did get so lucky to have a full moon during our stay here, so our hotel swiftly arranged this tour (in house) to make sure we didn’t miss it and that we got to experience the falls completely lit up at 10pm with a rainbow dipping its way out of the sky and into the water. I’ve never seen the northern lights before, but I imagine it’s a similar feeling to this one. Pure, unmanufactured nature that shows you something beyond your wildest dreams.

And…it felt great to walk off dinner late at night and climb about 1,000 stairs back up from the falls. Redefining the luxury of a summer night walk (just without the frozen yogurt).

You should also totally just walk the trails of the park during the day, as well. We didn’t make the trek to the Argentina side because we didn’t feel like waiting in the customs line, but if we had another day, we totally would have.

Parque das Aves (bird sanctuary)

I need you to seriously take my word for this one. I do not like a typical zoo or any place in the world that takes animals from their home. But- I promise you I am a trusted contact here because my dad happens to be one of the only exotic veterinarians in the world that specializes specifically in birds, and if you want to see the native birds of the rainforest, this is the best way to do it.

Do I wish I got to see a toucan or a blue-fronted amazon in the fully wild? Yes of course. We still got to see some incredible lizards, coatis, and other parrot species, but toucans, for example, stay far far away from places that humans could be gracing, so your best bet is to see them at this sanctuary!

You are able to exist with the birds, some more calm than others, and observe every little mannerism they have. We saw snuggling parrots and sleepy owls and got the most wholesome dose of serotonin being reminded what incredible species exist in this world among us far away from home.

3.5 days in Rio de Janeiro

Alllll right so we’re coming full circle back to Rio, which actually started my trip, but I didn’t want to bore you guys with my continued, very long intro, so I thought I would save the most interesting for last.

Where I stayed-

We had a few recommendations to stay at the Fasano because of its prime location on Ipanema beach and gorgeous pool deck, but I’m not entirely sure I’d recommend it to a friend, myself.

What we liked:

The location was indeed gorgeous. It was a treat to be able to walk out the front door and be right on the beach. The pool deck also did feel quite luxe- we loved being able to use the sauna (especially after a long flight) and then dip right into the infinity pool that felt like it connected with the two brothers mountains in the sky. The cocktails and sunset here were irreplaceable, and the staff up at the pool deck was really sweet and always make sure I had a warm robe as I got out of the pool. I’m personally more into a maximalist type interior, but the wood finishes and mirrors in the rooms and on the roof were stunning.

{but if you must know} What we didn’t love:

For over $850 a night, we felt like attention to detail and experience could have been a little bit different. I….literally sound like I’m writing a google review or talking to a customer support bot? But the front desk staff wasn’t super warm or helpful- we asked them for help booking tours, which we could have done ourselves, but we wanted their opinion on the best companies or hikes (just as an example) to do especially after my phone was stolen and we wasted a day dealing with that and wanted to make sure we were spending our (now) limited time left correctly. On that note, obviously there was nothing they could have done to help the phone situation, but we asked them about advice on sim cards and they just wrote down the name of the biggest mall in the city instead of helping us get a bit more specific on the store or where we might be able to get one with an American passport because the process is a bit more complex. (We ended up completely ditching the sim card idea)

I also consider myself extremely self sufficient and easy to please- it would be rare for me to even rely on the front desk for a question or help about the location I’m in, but we felt like we were paying so much money for a very impersonal experience. The lobby also felt like it was under construction, maybe? There was barely any place to lounge or sit because a portion of it was curtained off, and the “beach service” ran out of umbrellas and chairs for the day after like 2 families requested them.

I don’t mean to rant because we still had a very lovely and comfortable time here, but I want to get really serious about giving my extremely honest opinion about things that I spend a lot of money on, and the other two hotels we stayed in in Uruguay and Iguazu (which were less $) made us feel so incredibly special and welcome.

What I did-

Copacabana and Ipanema

We came to Rio mainly to relax and enjoy the beach, and of course made ourselves feel really bad when we didn’t tour as much as we thought we should have, but we did absolutely love both Ipanema and Copacabana beaches. You really are meant to make a day out of the beach here- the energy starts picking up around 11am with the first peaks of the UV rays, and local vendors have anything and everything you need.

You could have Acai and Mate for breakfast, right on the beach, then get corn, skewers, prawns, and Caipirinhas (the best sugarcane and lime alcoholic bev omg) for lunch and dinner into sunset and never leave your towel.

I shouldn’t have even used the word towel, because here they use Cangas, which are a much more lightweight fabric that dry so quickly and can literally go around your shoulders or tied around your waste like a little cover up. We also immediatley went to Havaianas and bought flip flops and did not wear any other shoe while we were there. I even wore them to the nicest restaurant we went to and no one even batted an eye. I wanted to bottle the laid back energy up with me and pour it on the entire city of New York.

Santa Teresa

I absolutely fell in love with the Santa Teresa neighborhood and all of the sidewalks and walls that were tattooed with local art and color. It quite literally felt like we were going up a rollercoaster on our taxi ride up- everything was so steep and hilly, but once we made it to the top, the views of the city below showed the detailed depth of all of the neighborhoods stacked like a layered cake. It sort of reminded me on the Montmartre neighborhood of Paris, and naturally some parts of Lisbon, but if you’re looking for vintage and art shopping, Santa Teresa is your place.

If I return to Rio, I would love to stay in Santa Teresa! It’s a bit further from the beach, but feels like you’re in a lush treehouse. We also visited the ever so classic Escadaria Selarón yellow stairs which lead you down to Lapa, which is the center of the city. I would recommend going earlier in the morning, because it was admittedly swarmed with people in the afternoon when we went.

We ate at Bar do Mineiro to try feijoada, which is a classic pork and bean stew with a side of oranges, rice, and crispy pork. It had a classic watering hole feel and we stayed and sipped negronis while we ate. I would have been shouting from the rooftops about how much I loved this place if we didn’t get slightly scammed at the end- our waiter brought over a massive plate of fried cheese that we didn’t order, asked if we liked cheese, we (confusingly) said yes, he insisted we try it, and then charged us for it? Maybe this is a tactic I don’t know about, but the dish was already made so we didn’t really know how to politely turn him away.

The Sugarloaf Cable Car is also a good midway point between Copacabana and Santa Teresa which we bought tickets for and really wanted to do, but there was a problem with their ticketing system so we sadly had to leave but would be one of the first things I’d attempt again if I went back- it’s touristy but the views are incredible.

Parque Penhasco Dois Irmãos

We did a mild hike in the national park that sits at the foot of one of the Dois Irmaos mountains! This is the park I mentioned in the beginning that had the first section of the trail open, but closed off the second portion of the trail to the public. We’re not sure the reason for the closure- it was raining on and off that morning and looked a bit muddy, but maybe the park was working on some maintenance or there are seasonal limits that we didn’t know about! Alas, the overlooks onto the beach and the Leblon neighborhood were breathtaking and we got to see some adorable lemurs so we didn’t feel like it was a total fail!

Where I ate-

Sult

Yes…I had the best lasagna of my entire existence in Brazil, and it was at Sult. Better than I Sodi or Don Angie’s wildest dreams, and paired with a buttery Brazilian steak, tartare, salad, and their version of a dirty martini with lime. I also loved how I felt like I was dining right in someones living room- the type where the windows are cracked and the breeze is coming in during a late dinner on a summer night. We also loved the Botafogo neighborhood in general and wish we explored the bar scene more here as the bars spilled out onto the sidewalks into the streets with lively crowds and live music.

Satyrincon

My favorite meal of the trip was undoubtably at Satyrincon, which specializes in both raw and Brazilian style grilled seafood. We basically let our waiter order for us because his warm and hospitable welcome instantly gained our trust that it seemed like he had been at the restaurant for years and knew everything like the back of his hand. He brought us rainbow cuts of buttery local crudo over ice and a platter of grilled langoustine, prawns, and lobster that had a special, off menu garlic sauce that he insisted we dip every bite into. It was decadent and washed down perfectly with a dirty martini, and somewhere I insist you go.

Bar Tero

Lots of bars in Rio have vermouth on tap, which is a recent addiction of mine because it’s (of course delicious) but also slightly lower in alcohol content so you can enjoy a few and not be absolutely plastered. Bar Tero had multiple different types of vermouth made in house, on tap, including a white vermouth which was my absolute favorite. If I had to sketch an image of a dreamy sidewalk table, it would be the one we sat at at Bar Tero, with an antique lamp in the center of all, only illuminating everyones best features and the gorgous cocktails being sipped. We had a later dinner reservation so we didn’t order too much food, but we wish we got more. The cheesy, Brazilian style mussels were fantastic.

Aprazível

This Santa Teresa restaurant captured fairy rainforest magic with lanterns and twinkling lights over every table that looked like cores of a 100 year old oak trees. I’m such a sucker for theatrical secret garden decor like this that it definitely made the food taste better than it was, but we still thoroughly enjoyed our fresh fish and coconut rice with a bottle of Sancerre. I would maybe recommend coming here at sunset for a cocktail and a snack to take in the views and the funk, but you probably don’t need to spend on a full dinner.

Acai

I could have eaten Acai for breakfast, lunch, and dinner here and had been fully content. The Acai here is different. It almost tastes more like chocolate than tropical fruit? Extremely variant from the classic Playa Bowls banana-y flavor we’re used to in the US. We tried both Bibi Sucos and Big Polis and I could not get enough. Get a side of berries and condensed milk (trust me) and put a tiny spoonful on a few bites.

Ophelia

I was craving a long and late lunch as I mentioned earlier that I tend to crave on vacation, and this spot was highly rated on Beli and I wanted to perch near the beach with a spritz and grilled shellfish. I would absolutely come back here for the onion tart and the prawns. I wouldn’t order the octopus again, it was a bit chewy, but I think this is a good, casual neighborhood lunch spot for a solid afternoon cocktail that then fades into watching the sunset nearby on the Leblon end of the beach.

In conclusion…

I know this one was ridiculously long, but I hope it is a true, meaty reference point for anyone who is planning to go to any of these places. I also wanted to clarify the reason we even ended up in Sao Paulo to begin with was because we missed the connection on our flight home and had to stay an additional 24 hours in Brazil before another one took off. I did feel like we had more bad luck than usual, but also real, raw learnings.

I also know I haven’t written in awhile, and I also know that I planned to go on this trip and disconnect to re-grow my creative cells, and had no idea I would actually be disconnecting without a phone, but it is crazy how much clean space you make in your brain when you aren’t scrolling. To wake up and not immediately check socials or respond to 50 texts (which was scary because I had no idea who was texting me because I had zero access to my phone number) was a feeling that I can only compare to a feeling I had in the summer as a child before I had a phone.

I’ve never been addicted to nicotine, but I imagine the anxiety and withdrawal that I was feeling on the first day of having no phone to the last day of having no phone was decently similar. I want to write more about this specifically, but for now, thank you for reading Crumbs of South America! If you have been, I would love to hear what I missed and should do on my next adventure there, because I will undoubtedly be back.

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A routine, especially a good routine, is difficult to craft and unbelievably difficult to follow. Every winding turn of my young adult life has led me to try out some new and improved routine. Probably a routine that I learned about half asleep on my phone on a Tuesday night…knowing that part of my new and improved routine was probably to stop scrolling on social media right before bed.

But we all know how these things go- life gets in the way, things rarely stick. But if there’s one thing about food within a routine and going out to eat in New York City, for most of us, it seems like visiting the same places over and over certainly doesn’t stick. The concept of being a regular isn’t really that regular.

And if I was a restaurant owner, I feel like my dream would be to have regulars, for the sake of business, and also for the sake of community. But because trends here blow over faster than a west side wind tunnel, I always wonder how many establishments actually feel like they’ve achieved the concept of having regulars. Or how many people consider themselves to be regulars. Is this something businesses even care about anymore?

I love a discussion based newsletter, so if you do own an establishment, I’d want to hear your take on this concept.

One of my best friends strives to be nothing but a regular. And this goes for her routine in New York City and her routine everywhere she travels. Being with her deeply grounds me and helps me pause on the tiktokification of my constant running list of must-trys because she doesn’t have a running list. In fact, if anything, she has a list of personal contacts at every coffee shop, bookstore, fabric store, grocery store, and restaurant she frequents. Hosts and waiters sit at our table when I dine with her as if they’re a close friend. Local people in the community are updating her on their personal projects because she’s so invested in making New York feel small.

She could potentially feel differently, but coming from someone who writes a newsletter on the nyc restaurant scene and does…to some degree love to try new places, it’s nice to take a page out of a book from someone who has no hit list. To crave the platonic intimacy of seeing the same 3 baristas on rotation every morning, depending on the day of the week. To actually consistently support small businesses in our corners because lord fucking knows we need to right now as the world is on fire.

So with that being said, and pardon my emotional and sprawling intro, I’d love to talk about five local businesses I practically can’t go a week without. Places that make up more of my DNA than my top 10s of all time. Places that make me think…why wouldn’t this place be my #1 restaurant in NYC based on sheer frequency. Instead of a 4 Charles that I get to go to maybe once a year.

1. Oslo Coffee

Getting your footing at a nyc coffee shop takes time. I would describe my own personal progression of this to start at a different ‘cute’ new coffee shop every weekend, probably one that had some sort of cream top drink, sometimes hot, sometimes cold…to (now) quite literally only spending money on cold brew at one location, Oslo.

There’s about 3 seats in the whole place at tables that look like they were bought at an estate sale for a closed down public school. The wood and the smell of them are elementary and familiar, and if you sit back too far you’ll be sure to knock over one of their many antique trinkets or printed photos that clutter the walls above. There might even be a few pieces of gum stuck to the bottoms.

It’s not a place you’re meant to linger, but a place to get a damn strong cup of coffee that brings you to your next destination as a much better human. If I could bottle up the caffeinated feeling of my first twenty minutes with my Oslo coffee, I would pour that feeling into a martini glass with dinner, roll it up into a joint, or take a shot of it out of a small plastic cup at the bar.

I’m not encouraging you to be the person that buys the $7 coffee every single day. This is a Friday and Saturday morning special for me. Something that genuinely gets me out of bed in the dark winter months to see the baristas on a Saturday morning who are too cool to even recognize me, but fill the void of familiar faces in my story.

Who knew I could churn out a few paragraphs about a cold brew.

2. The Ssam

I have been hooked on summer rolls for years and have always been grossly jealous of those summer roll only places in LA where you get to build your own and stuff the stretchy rice paper with pickled mango and peanut goodness. I also loved my precious time with my summer rolls in Vietnam, the country I’ve traveled to with the most colorful, digestible, and vegetable forward cuisine thus far.

These hyper-fixations led me down a golden road to the The Ssam, an unassuming storefront that only sells summer rolls with both Korean and Vietnamese ingredients. I also happen to crave Korean food to the point of eating Gochujang paste on a daily basis right out of the box, so this fusion simply scratches a different level of itch. These summer rolls are the size of chipotle burritos. They are busting at the seams with bulgogi beef, cucumber, mango, vermicelli noodles, carrots, and (another drinkable) pickled pineapple chili sauce to further brighten every bite.

They don’t have a huge public presence, but everyone who I’ve ever ordered from at the tiny establishment has been nothing but kind. I also am guilty of getting this delivered to me at least once a week, so maybe they do know my name by now.

3. A massage at QQ

Finding your masseuse is similar to finding your cup of coffee in NYC. I’ve tried lush and aesthetic places like Spencer’s, and also a few spots in Chinatown and have never found a massage as incredible as the one at QQ Nail Spa on Christopher Street in the West Village.

Here’s what you’re going to do. You have to call, because they’re primarily nails, not massages, but you’re going to call and ask for a 30 minute back massage with Kriti. This massage is not even the type of massage where you’re lying flat in a back room, it’s the kind where you’re propped up so she’s able to untangle every single twist and turn in your neck.

If you’re someone who cares more about arms and legs, this isn’t the massage for you. This is the massage for all of you Substack writers that have a moat of knots around every single muscle and head and sinus pressure. She’s able to detect exactly where the body needs to let go, and I always walk out of there awaiting the greatest sleep I’ll have had all week. And yes, I go every single week. It’s the best $45 I’ll spend.

4. St. Agrestis Drinks

A little habit I’ve adopted from college is the habit of making myself a fun little drink to sip on as I’m getting ready for a fun night out. Regardless of how old I get, the combination of music, mascara, and now…a mocktail is integral to the concept of romanticizing a night of unknowns in New York City.

I still love to have a few martinis, but I am completely and totally obsessed with the Phony Negroni mocktails (the white is my favorite), and I love sipping on one to feel like I’m doing something indulgent before a night out, but not actually increasing my number of alcoholic beverages. They’re based in Brooklyn, which makes me love the brand even more, and I had the pleasure of chatting with a fellow restaurant lover on their team recently, , who also writes a great column.

The difference in two martinis versus three martinis is actually pretty steep in contributing to my thoughts, feelings, and dreams the next morning when I wake up with a headache, so making this swap has become a special and intentional part of my routine now.

5. Weekly takeout faves

I thought I would just make a list for this one instead of highlighting one individual spot because I go in phases with my weeknight takeout staples. Some current ones at the top of my list are:

1. Locanut- their kale chicken caesar wrap is to die for. My hack is to add buffalo sauce into the side dressing they give and shake it up to be a ~buffalo chicken caesar wrap

2. Poke rice- the freshest poke that I’ve sampled with amazing pickled toppings. I always do half rice half greens and drizzle a ponzu

3. Springbone- I know everyone obviously knows about Springbone, but their new tomato cheddar soup has been on rotation for me

4. Ginger and Lemongrass- another one of my favorite places in the city for summer rolls and a coconut lemongrass pho

5. Rooted- the first few times I had it I thought it was a tad bit too salty, but their new steak is cooked to perfection and I crave their spaghetti squash

6. (Honorable Mention) Tomo 21

The only reason Tomo 21 is an honorable mention is because I can’t afford to do a whole sit-down sushi every single week, but if I could, I would go to this unassuming slice of heaven as part of my routine. It’s the type of place you’d probably miss if you were standing across the street, but if it happened to catch your eye, the foggy private windows would show cozy, solo diners with plates of large rainbow squares over white pressed rice.

It’s also very reasonably priced for a whole nigiri set ($48) with huge pieces of the freshest nigiri, but part of me always feels a tiny bit guilty getting this on a weeknight. The exact scenario you’re going to want to get Tomo 21 is a Friday night when you want to stay local, wear no makeup, and enjoy a hot cup of green tea and huge plate of sushi, all to yourself, and enter into what the kids are now calling a “flow state”.

The staff is so kind and the hand drawn sushi art and stickers all over the walls makes me feel like I’m in their home. Clearly they opted for family member’s doodles over hiring an interior designer, but it feels so fitting because they’re more invested in buttery fish than an art collection.

What spots can you not go a week without?

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It was a natural birth, one that took place at my chipping dining room table instead of in a bathtub with a midwife. This birthing bit is funny because if you know me, you know that giving birth and having children is still not something I’ve coined as a current calling.

In fact, the only true instinct I've grown in the last year of my later-twenties life is hosting and the concept of being ok with people wearing shoes in your apartment after you’ve had one glass of wine. Or standing and eating spoonfuls of cold pasta after it’s been passed around a few times.

(To set the record though- I do not claim the trad-wife trend of hosting. I'm actually a pretty bad cook, it takes me until five in the evening the following Sunday after a party to start the dishes, and I pretty much always use fake flowers.)

And yes, I know I’ve beaten a dead horse recently by talking about my supper club in my most recent articles, but the focus of this one is to get you comfortable with being the host when an external location can’t offer you the experience you have in mind.

For the times when it just makes way more sense to create the experience yourself instead of fighting for a reservation for a large (or small!) group that just won’t be able to embody the occasion you want to celebrate. When you want your friends to be able to lay on your couch with a glass of wine and piece of cake at midnight when the restaurant would have kicked you out.

Hosting can also be about creating an experience with your existing community. It isn’t a burden you have to fully take on yourself. As I mentioned, I personally (rarely) cook, but hosting has allowed me to tap into my love for tablescaping and fun themes, while sharing the responsibilities with my friends who have the talent for cooking or baking, for example, and want to collaborate on an unforgettable evening.

So with that, cheers to a year of experiences at homes of all shapes and sizes, doing everything that a restaurant, in many cases, can’t always do.

How to get confident hosting this year

1. You don’t have to have a ton of food

Feeding people is usually the thing that makes hosting seem like an impossible task. A set menu is way too expensive, family style is hard to gauge portion-wise, and guests have preferences and allergies. Lately, I’ve been spoiled as I’ve gotten to work with extremely talented private chefs like platedbykelly and my friend Colin (who is socialmedialess), but many many times have I fully relied on ordering reasonably priced catering/takeout or doing a potluck style, and neither took away from the evening.

People also just…don’t eat a much as you think. Even with the catering that I’ve ordered in the past, I always have tons of leftovers and people rarely have room for dessert (even though I personally can’t get behind that and always have room), so even if the recommended portion feeds 10, rarely 10 actual portions are taken. Make sense?

You don’t ever need more than one entree and one side dish, but I’d argue that having the ever so popular “grazing table” concept with accoutrements like olives, fruit, and chips for people to snack on as they’re sipping a cocktail or glass of wine usually fills everyone up. And when it’s time for the actual hot food, only a few bites are taken.

This is also not me telling you to accidentally starve your friends, this IS me telling you from experience that I’ve never not had (tons) of leftovers from a dinner party, and to simply not overcomplicate the menu.

Easy concepts I love: (have talked about some of these before)

1. Wegmans Sushi Platter- $120 for 75 pieces of Sushi

2. A dozen 7th Street burgers + fries- less than $100 and loved by everyone

3. Ordering a square pie pizza and cutting it up into mini squares- bonus points if you get it from Emmetts on Grove

4. Olives, fruit, kettle cooked chips + onion dip, popcorn, prosciutto + chips - all can be bought at Trader Joes and plated in an elevated format

5. Fresh baguette + whipped butter- around $20 and so easy to make with an electric whisk

6. XL spicy rigatoni + caesar salad catering from Ferdi if you need mains- you can feed 12 people for under $200

2. It’s all about presentation

As a continuation of the above list, you can make anything and everything look and feel elevated with presentation. All you need are a few silver trays in your arsenal which are usually in abundance for amazing prices at Mother of Junk if you’re willing to polish some of it yourself, and of course all over Etsy and Ebay. My favorite Amazon staples for plating are also these silver coupes that are perfect for olives, snacks, mousse, puddings, etc and these tiered silver trays that work for pizza, burgers, fries, and anything you want to elevate. Height also makes alllll the difference with plating, which is why I love tiers and footed trays.

If you’re willing to invest a tiny bit more in silver, silver shell dishes are also all over Etsy and make any salad or main dish to be passed around like a pasta or a meat look incredible.

3. Bring back the $30 beer pong table

Whenever I help consult for a custom birthday party that I’m helping design, a big fair concern is the simple lack of a long table, and I’m here to tell you that all you need is an 8ft plastic foldable table to make your wildest tablescape dreams come to life.

It folds up small enough to slide under a bed or be tucked into a closet, and with a good tablecloth, not a soul will ever know that you’re using a literal…beer pong table. An 8ft table can fit 5 people on each side and two people on the ends, and if living room space in your New York City apartment is a (again, very fair) concern, the 6ft option still fits around 8 people. I also don’t think people need formal seats- the seats you do have + a desk chair usually works, but a set of 4 black foldable chairs is decently cheap and can also usually fit under a bed or in a closet.

4. It’s ok to ask people to chip in!

Depending on the format of your party, you generally should not be taking on the burden of the full hosting cost. If it’s your birthday, have your guests chip in! If you or your friend is offering to cook, asking for a little help to cover ingredients is totally ok. If it feels weird to ask for actual monetary compensation, BYOB is extremely fair (whichI think everyone would agree on), or a potluck where you guests contribute something is also super low lift. This is actually a topic that I’d love comments on, because I feel like some people think asking people to chip in is a strange concept, but I think it encourages regular hosting in a healthy way.

People also forget what cleaning up after hosting is like if they don’t host often, so asking for a little help on costs to have enough food and drink for everyone to munch on seems entirely appropriate to me. Another reminder that if you’re hosting instead of going out to a group dinner, your guests would usually be spending over $100 on dinner and drinks anyway.

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4. Unlimited booze is actually sort of cheap

I remember talking to an owner of a bar recently and we were talking about restaurant margins. Obviously I don’t own a restaurant, but hosting events has opened my eyes to how restaurants monetize on the cost of supplies for the food and drink they provide, and the only way money is really made is…alcohol.

I’m saying this because you can make a large format cocktail (in my recommended martini dispenser, of course) for 20 guests for the price of like 3 cocktails at a bar. It’s one thing if you’re into top shelf alcohol, but for most of us, you can get a decent handle of 1.75ml of Gin to make a martini for about $70 and a few bottles of orange wine and you have enough drinks for your guests for the majority of the evening, especially if you are also telling folks to BYOB. With cool cocktail dispensers these days, I’m not sure (why anyone, frankly) would hire a bartender for a party unless it was a wedding or over 50 people.

5. All you need is a tablecloth

The single most important thing to the look of a dinner party when hosting is the tablecloth. You can bring any table- wood, plastic, glass, etc to life with a simple tablecloth. I have a few of my favorites linked here, but also love using a big piece of fabric, or getting a simple white/cream/light pink embroidered high quality option secondhand that you can use for pretty much any occasion. I feel like the topic of decor and tablescaping, alone, probably needs a series of articles, but if I could pick one thing to transform an experience, it would be a tablecloth...

…and if anyone cared, next place would be a few taper candles (please skip the flowers, they’re so expensive).

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It would probably make me way more flustered if one of my airpods fell out during the hug even though listening to music for another two minutes is crushing the awkward lead up silence. Fun fact: I actually knocked one of my friend’s headphones out one time and it went down the subway drain.

How can I avoid eye contact for the first introductory fifteen minutes? Especially because I’m breaking out and I should probably just address the pimple on my face immediately when I see them to just…get that out of the way.

I wish I was kidding when I say this is my brain. But the other thing about my brain is that it went through a craving for later twenties chaos and experimentation in 2025. Almost in a way that I was able to turn off the ability to overanalyze and turn on the ability to execute on something that still feels so far from reality. It sounds almost like dissociation, and it could be, but why would someone so socially anxious that overthinks any and every interaction want to start hosting an in-person, non-virtual, and VERY human layer to the thing that is a substack newsletter? Am I a company pushing for a 5 day a week return to office?

It feels like the most extreme form of exposure therapy, but having my substack readers physically come over for dinner was the best thing I’ve ever done in my life and its entirety.

To talk about the way in which this was conducted, I’ll answer your burning questions-

No, I didn’t have all 150 readers in my apartment at one time. Although that now sounds like my dream, even though I fear we’d all be really sweaty.

Instead, we’re all still…decently sweaty still, but I decided to create a supper club for my readers to be able to meet other readers that had similar interests. And then hopefully walk away with a few new friends out of it.

Each dinner had between eighteen and twenty people. None of which had ever crossed paths.

The attendees were my paid readers. I wish they were everyone, but sadly I’m not a millionaire and hosting (as I have learned) is, well, expensive.

Stranger danger wasn’t and isn’t a concern because Substack yields the best people.

The club was therefore founded on a few principles:

1. I was damn jealous of the supper club concept. I kept seeing them all over the internet, but nobody could ever tell me how to gain access to said supper clubs, and all I saw were these long tables with ornate arrangements decorating endless laughter and community. So therefore, I decided to be cheeky and make my own

2. (…Members clubs in New York also kind of freak me out a little bit, or maybe I’m just afraid of rejection)

3. I write about restaurants so my readers are mainly restaurant lovers. I wanted more friends to try restaurants with, and so did my readers.

4. Making friends in New York, specifically in your twenties, is a tall task.

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So, here’s everything I learned from hosting intimate events with readers IRL

1. We all desperately need community

Let’s rip up the concept of protecting your peace in 2026. A read that really stuck with me was ’s, Your Phone is Why You Don’t Feel Sexy, which basically talks about smartphone addiction and why we’re all so ok with isolation now. I used to look forward to coming home from dinner with friends so I could lay in bed on my phone in my own little world. And I’m not saying I don’t love to scroll. I certainly do. But I also think that the concept of turning down plans and opportunities to meet new friends is very normal now that our phones know us best.

Community building truly is the one thing that cannot be replaced by technology. Even if AI ‘takes all of our jobs’, (real fear) we’ll be left with nothing to turn to but community. But, because we haven’t reached doomsday (yet), the type of community I’m attempting to build is a way to bring the curated, ‘for you’-esque feed to you in real life.

(And no, I’m not idolozing or actually trying to emulate the actual concept of the fyp, I’m just trying to mirror the craving of personal interests that keeps us chained to our phones, but in actual people with those interests instead of reels)

How am I doing this? I have a silly little Notion form that I have all of my attendees fill out prior to the dinner party that asks them to write 5 words that describe them, anything they have strong hatred for (important), and what they’re looking to get out of New York right now. I then curate invites for upcoming dates based on people that I think share similar interests.

I bet 99% of my attendees wish they could cancel their tickets as they’re about to walk into the dinner party. It all sounds like fun until you walk into a room of people you don’t know. But the hope is: everyone heads home feeling like they have a new community here, whether it’s a community to fall back on, or a community to further engage in. A lot of the topics I’ve heard come up are things like: I need to be held accountable for finally starting writing on Substack this year, or, I’ve been meaning to get back into painting. Community helps hold you accountable, if anything at all.

2. Substack has the best people on the internet

There are fair elements of stranger danger when hosting events, but I admittedly haven’t thought about it as much as I should be thinking of it, simply because brings us the best people of the world. Substack readers and writers just get it. Chances are, at least one or two of my readers in attendance also designs tablescapes, or bakes creative pastries, or writes about interiors, or travel, or restaurants in New York that they can’t live without. Substack readers have hobbies, and they’re open to meeting other friends who have that same hobby.

Substack readers also love cats. They also aren’t afraid to engage in discourse, or be vulnerable in group settings, and they certainly are the most respectful, most low maintenance, detail oriented bunch on the internet, (and now around my dinner table). I have had the pleasure of meeting writers of some of my favorite publications through this supper club, like who writes fierce pieces on fashion, beauty, and color combinations, who writes all about the rollercoaster that is dating in NYC, and by who writes all about pop culture. So if you want to start hosting events, invite people on Substack.

3. Deep conversation is an amazing high

I want you to get in tune with yourself for a moment and reflect on the way you felt recently departing from plans with friends. Did you feel Energized? Relieved? Grinning? Drained?

If there’s one main takeaway from this experiment that is connecting random strangers, it’s that new connections via deep conversation is the highest of highs. People that just get it. Like a…where has this person been my whole life? type conversation. And dear lord, I’m not claiming to be the facilitator of these conversations amongst my guests. I’m sure many walked away maybe not feeling this way at all, but some of the conversations I have had with new friends in this community have been some of my favorites, ever. The type where you see close friends forming infront of your eyes, when three people run over to the table to get a spot next to one another so they can continue covering whatever topic was stirred up with their cocktails. The type where two new friends share a slice of cake because they’re both too full for a single one. The type where the windows are cracked, espresso martinis are poured, and voices become raised over common passions.

These are all conversations I want to keep in my pocket forever.

4. Phones are nowhere to be found

I literally do not have service at my place. I have wifi, but without my wifi, you can barely do anything. I thought about putting my wifi up on the wall at one point, but no one ever asks for it. And then suddenly at the end when the clock strikes midnight and everyone is calling a car home, that’s when everyone realizes that my apartment literally has no service. Maybe people are dying to be on their phones and are too polite to ask for my wifi, but I’ve found that meeting new friends sort of forces you to get off of your phone. How awkward would it be to meet someone and pull up Instagram?

I really don’t think you need to go as far as making a party a ‘no phone’ party. I’ve seen this concept quite a bit recently as figures like have started hosting ‘screenless’ events. I think it’s cool, but I think if you can create connection, activities, discussion, and excitement you don’t need to go as far as creating a policy around the concept.

5. Feeding twenty people is a fun challenge

Hahaha. Ah. I have learned so much about event planning, catering, and cooking without being an event planner, caterer, or chef. I have an immense respect for those that work in the food service or events industry, as it is a real challenge trying to think of large format dishes to feed more than like…five people? How do people cater weddings of two hundred people?

But I’m telling you, it’s a fun challenge that has made me look at food differently. Every dish I order at a restaurant then crosses my mind as a ‘I wonder if I could make or cater a large format version of this’ thought. It’s just so hard to keep steak warm and fries from not getting soggy! I’ll eventually make a guide around the best restaurants and chefs I’ve worked with for this exact occasion, but even with the help of a caterer I usually find myself in the kitchen the majority of the party getting overheated in a sequin dress and slicing up lasagna.

Wouldn’t trade it for the world, though.

So it’s safe to say that I have a social battery that I never thought I’d have at the ripe age of twenty six, and have met the most incredible restaurant lovers that New York City has to offer. And I know this piece wasn’t my usual, but I was just taking a minute to reflect and feel like it’s so important to be in community next year. I also just want to talk more about hosting, tablescapes, events, etc on here because I’ve learned a tremendous amount about these topics, so consider this my intro!

More in 2026 x

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There have been many learnings for me this year, about myself and about my relationship with Mrs. Substack, to include:

1. The writing: Being consistent with writing is hard as hell, even if you love every second of it. When life pulled me in many directions this year, the act of grounding myself to put pen to paper felt really really hard at times. I started out strong by writing almost one new piece a week, and when I skipped weeks, sometimes even months at times, the one underlying sad and guilty feeling I had in the back of my head was that I was losing all of my discipline with writing. I’ve de-prioritized other things that weren’t serving me to make space for frequent writing again, but I have a deep appreciation and admiration for writers who manage to get a piece out weekly. I also have an appreciation for my subscribers who were still patient with me in my valleys of producing little writing during pockets of 2025.

2. The chat: My subscriber chat is the community I always dreamed of building. We share daily personal restaurant recommendations, we’ve talked (live) about first dates, and I even now know where to get my paints tailored in the West Village, all thanks to my subscriber chat. I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up, but I was always so interested in apps like Waze or even Yelp that run solely on crowdsourced recommendations and insights. Me, being the restaurant and city exploratoré (I just made this word up) that I am, spun on this idea of creating another app (eyeroll) or piece of technology where people could be doing exactly what they’re doing in my subscriber chat. Truthfully, when I started my chat, I thought it would be active for like a week and then die out. Not a day has gone by in 2025 without a thread from a subscriber asking for a recommendation without another subscriber, purely out of the goodness of their own heart, responding with a personal recommendation. , we need to talk here! I simply need to know if you have another chat as active as the Crumbs chat! And this chat is what this entire article is built on, 100 favorite restaurants of 2025, from over 100 subscribers, all within one thread.

   1. Some of my favorite, highly niche threads:

3. The community: I (very nervously) attempted taking things a step further this year and started hosting events in real life for my paid subscriber community- Club Crumbs. I wanted Club Crumbs to feel like ‘the next level’ of my subscriber chat. Like, ok cool, we all love recommending restaurants to each other here, but what if all of us foodies met for dinner in real life and befriended one another? Meeting friends in New York is hard as hell, and it was inspiring to me to see so many of my subscribers chatting daily online, so I wanted those subscribers to have the option to continue the conversation around a real, physical table. I have now met over 100 of my subscribers, in real life, which feels like another dream come true. But more on that in a separate article.

And without futher a-do, I’ll shut up and stop reflecting, but just wanted to tell my subscriber community in the best words that I possibly can…that they’ve changed my life. It isn’t about the restaurants or the places anymore, it’s about the people and their willingness to share so much with us outside of just reading along.

Crumbs Community Top 100 Restaurants

But first…some awards:

The most mentioned in the community…aka our “winner”

#1. Rosella:

Rosella also happens to be in my top 5 favorite restaurants, as well, and has been for the past 3 years. The music, the nigiri, the colors, the natural wine…the foggy windows…the pieces that build our favorite restaurant go on and on. I couldn’t recommend Rosella more, and hope everyone reading this has a chance to try their caviar french toast dessert in 2026.

My most favorite restaurant of 2025

Kabawa

I knew the second I saw a coconut water martini on the menu that this was going to top the charts for me. Bold Caribbean flavors written in limey, raw shrimp and textures of cassava dumplings in a texture I have never sensed or tasted in any other format ever in my life. Do I usually opt for goat? No, but this goat was the best dish of 2025, celebrated with the coconut loaf birthday cake that’s given with a candle, to anyone, on any day of the year. Pure genius.

And runners up:

1. Musaafer- I was absolutely blown away but every single dish and every corner I turned at Musaafer. Other than the jaw dropping mirrored interior, favorites were the lychee crudo, butter chicken experience, sea bass curry, and shortrib cashew curry. Their fiery cocktail bar downstairs is also the perfect winter hideaway for a snack and thoughtful drink.

2. Adda- Another restaurant with a butter chicken experience that is so different than Musaafer’s butter chicken experience, but somehow also one of the most memorable bites I’ve had this year. The cheesy and peppery lobster tail is also so notable, and I admittedly was slightly tipsy eating this meal and knocked over an entire glass of wine, but the staff was so kind and funny despite the little mishap and chatted with us extensively. Loved every second of it.

3. Bartolo- Have written about Bartolo a few times here. The combination of their salty martini and blue cheese cheesecake is the best flavoring pairing I’ve had to date. Yes, better than ‘olive oil on ice cream’. Can we stop doing that in 2026?

And now for the big list of Crumbs community’s #1 restaurants

(categorized by geographic locations):

New York City

1. American Bar

2. Angel

3. Ari Ari

4. Ayada

5. Bar Miller

6. Bartolo

7. Banh Anh Em

8. Bong

9. Bridges

10. Cafe Luxembourg

11. Cafe Mars

12. Café Mado

13. Chez Fifi

14. Clinton St. Baking Company

15. Corner Store Soho

16. Corima

17. Cosme

18. Cucina Alba

19. Da Toscano

20. Daniel

21. Delice & Sarrasin

22. Din Tai Fung NYC

23. Eyval

24. Evelina

25. Four Horsemen

26. Gage & Tollner

27. Gator

28. Ha’s Snack Bar

29. Hellbender

30. Inga’s Bar

31. I Cavallini

32. Izakaya Mew

33. Jiangnan NYC

34. JoJo

35. Jua

36. Jungsik

37. Joseph Leonard

38. Kabawa

39. Katana Kitten

40. Konban

41. Laser Wolf Brooklyn

42. Le Chêne

43. Le Crocodile

44. Le French Diner

45. Le Gigot

46. Le Veau d’Or

47. Lei

48. Little Ruby

49. Lord’s

50. Luanne’s Wild Ginger

51. Mamo

52. Misi

53. Monkey Bar

54. Muku

55. Nowon

56. Oxomoco

57. Peasant

58. Peter Luger

59. Pitt’s

60. Red Hook Tavern

61. Rolo’s

62. Roman’s

63. Rosella

64. Saga

65. Saint Julivert Fisherie

66. Semma

67. Smithereens

68. Sofreh

69. Soothr

70. Sunn’s

71. Swoony’s

72. The Bazaar

73. Theodora

74. Thirteen Water

75. Torrisi

76. Ume

77. Vato

78. Wayla

79. Win Son

80. With Others

Mexico City

82. Contramar

83. Máximo Bistrot

84. Rosetta

France

85. Cafe Very

86. Cheval d’Or

87. Mokonuts

88. Colombe d’Or

London

90. Berenjak

91. Brat

92. Brilliant Corners

Italy

93. La Giostra

94. Suavis Brace e Cucuna

St. Moritz

95. Chesa Veglia

Montreal

96. Dorsia Montreal

Japan

95. Itoh Dining

96. Kappo Sakamoto

Amsterdam

97. Madre

Philly

98. Suraya

New Orleans

99. Dakar – New Orleans

Maine

100. Izakaya Minato – Portland ME

Thank you all again, so so much for supporting and reading Crumbs. Let’s keep the conversation about your most memorable spots going in the comments! I would love to hear more:

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These feelings are the strongest on a Tuesday night walking home from work with numb hands and a forgotten scarf. It’s [still] about the time that I haven’t accepted that the cold is here to stay, and I can’t get away with just my thin black trench coat anymore. But walking through the icy sidewalks of the West Village on a weeknight and seeing wreaths guarding every doorstep, stores I’ve never thought twice about catch my eye with their thoughtful draped displays, and smoke coming from chimneys of buildings in the distance that brew a feeling none other than bliss and deep weeknight whimsy.

This gratitude for my city during the holidays naively landed me in Midtown Manhattan last weekend, a place I maybe find myself less than 10 (and change) times in a year. I haven’t seen THE midtown holiday displays since my first year living here when my roommates and I decided it was a fantastic idea to try and watch the tree lighting. As you would have guessed, we, and the thousands of others who had the same idea, ended up just getting hot chocolate at a Starbucks on 49th street to live out our festive dreams because they were at capacity…like the type of capacity where you go to do something wholesome and then randomly get screamed at by NYPD.

But I was determined, 4 years later, to take another stab at a Midtown Christmas. I started my day Uptown at the bustling Birley Bakery, and (like yeah) the line was long, but the croissants are flaky and the coffee is strong, so I didn’t mind looking at their sparkling garlands as I waited.

I leashed my cappuccino for a stroll with down Madison Ave to see all of the decorations glued to the exteriors of every store and restaurant. Gingerbread men and nutcrackers came out of hibernation to say hello as the Upper East truly embodies a winter village more than any other part of town. And because I was uptown, I chose to weave my way through a wintry Central Park to cross town west.

…But here’s where things declined. With every step further from UES and every step closer to Midtown West, the optics of the holiday blossomed, but the actual spirit faded. The ever so charming Plaza hotel had crowds of people loitering outside so large that there were probably 10 bouncers guarding the door, Bergdorfs, while beautifully decorated, had a 20 minute wait to get into one elevator, and the hotel bar we wanted to grab a quick martini at,The Baccarat, was “fully committed” 5 minutes after they opened.

Despite the odds, we still snuck in for a drink at the Baccarat and ended up having one too many martinis in decadent crystal glasses to match the decadent crystal chandeliers. It was stunning, but it was Midtown. And before you get frustrated with me ragging on midtown, this does not come from a place of “I don’t go above 14th street” rhetoric, it’s just that-no matter how many decorations you put up, the real magic exists in the coziest of corners of the city. Less displays and diamonds, more fireplaces and intimacy.

Coziest Holiday Nooks

1. Maison Barnes

The place written for parents visiting that want to see holiday decorations and have a festive brunch because they feel like ‘brunch’ as a concept is a necessary part of their visiting itinerary. Sitting at Maison Barnes at 1pm on a Saturday reminded me of nothing other than the fact that I haven’t been to a sit down brunch in probably two years. An avid brunch hater that comes alive during the holidays when a fully belly at 2pm (to tamper with your early dinner plans) takes priority over those dinner plans. Brunch also only feels somewhat right in uptown Manhattan in December, surrounded by chic elders who start their three hour brunches with a coffee and end with a bottle of rose.

Maison Barnes has an entryway that makes you feel nostalgic for a New York Christmas through the eyes of a visiting child. It’s the type of external entryway from the sidewalk that is decked out in glittering garland with a doorman that cosplays as a nutcracker, met with an internal doorway that opens with a velvet curtain to a packed bar of martini drinkers, forgetting it’s only noon. An entryway that feels like a hotel, but isn’t actually a hotel…if you know what I mean.

I took everything so seriously that I accidentally ordered the steak and eggs, which happened to be the most expensive thing on the menu, and I actually think that was my very first time having steak and eggs. To me it’s always felt like a bit of a lazy dish, like oh look! let’s just take a dinner entree and add an egg to make it breakfast(!)- but it melted in my mouth just as much as the fig pavlova from the vintage dessert cart did.

2. Cafe Carlyle

The Carlyle Hotel wears the holidays like tried and true denim- and I stand by the fact that it’s a true synonym to depiction of nyc through the dreams of the traveler from Nebraska that is imagining a ‘fancy hotel’ during Christmastime in the city. Lots of Nebraskans, and Floridians, and Mississippians must feel this way because the line to get a drink at Bemelman’s bar has sprawled out of control for three to four hours on end.

The trick here is to avoid the hell out of Bemelman’s. Go any other day or any other time other than December. Please. But open your Resy app before you leave in a fit after the harsh news delivered by the (poor) host, because you’ll find that you’re geographically closest to an open reservation at Cafe Carlyle, which just so happens to be the restaurant (yes, restaurant!!!!) across the hall from Bemelman’s bar, and they pretty much always have reservations.

It’s new(er) so I don’t think a ton of people know about it, but the art and the ambience is just as eclectic as the bar, the steak was cooked to perfection, and the exact same martini that is served at Bemelman’s is served, and you’ll feel the same red cheeked holiday flush that you were debating a 3 hour wait for across the hallway.

3. Sevilla

The frosted window extraordinaire spanning the West Village corner in every novel that sets the scene for downtown New York in December. Sevilla was actually a no phone dinner for me- not in a weird way, but in a- getting two lucky bar seats on a Friday night during the holidays after the host was about to turn us away- way. Our neighboring elbows at the bar were bumping our sangria left and right that there was no room for photos, just boiled octopus and sizzling shrimp.

When the old fashioned tune of Christmas hits sing about the act of rejoicing and being merry, I think of Sevilla. A no frills, heavily decorated, family operated (no idea if it actually is, just feels like it is) establishment that starts with a single drink and ends with 4. It only feels right to come up for air two hours later, spilling out into the streets with a hallmark snow storm that can’t even penetrate the warmth of wine on your skin.

You won’t find me giving too many downtown recs during the holidays, Minetta Tavern is another rare one I’ll always stand by, but Sevilla is the place to beat the crowds and truly bask in the year’s memories and be present in reflection.

4. La Mercerie

Here she is, it’s ….THE tree in the grand hotel. It’s all about the tree at La Mercerie. And another brunch pick? Not sure what’s happening to me here, but I’m telling you, brunch is only acceptable (and randomly superior?) during the holidays. Maybe it’s the shining silver candle holders or the fluffed white alpine rugs that live in the ornate furniture store that shares the room beyond the arch of the restaurant that makes the tree look even more handsome, but this is by far my favorite one.

To pivot from your Christmas shopping plans uptown, La Mercerie welcomes arms of bags and boxes after a day in Soho securing gifts for all, and has the perfect savory crepe and shrimp cocktail ready to land on your table as you rest your legs and finally take your heavy coat off. Who knows, maybe you’ll pick up one of their overpriced (but admittedly top tier) coffee table books for sale in the store section for that friend that just moved into a new apartment. That’s always a yearly persona to find a gift for.

5. Chateau Royale

A new spot that embodies holiday energy is always risky to recommend as the classics usually prevail this time of year, but for those that want to feel winter magic on a 1am type of night out over a giggly martini and one of the best burgers of 2026, Chateau Royale’s late night menu fits the feeling perfectly. The air here feels similar to another one of my winter favorites, Pearl Box, that is also quite chalet-like with splashes of deep red and wood paneled walls that you’d imagine in a tiny northern french town.

I’m not trying to be a sensationalist when I say that this is the best dirty martini in New York City right now. I still don’t know what umami means, but it was the first word that came to mind with my first sip. Caviar service is also very affordable here, and always feels more acceptable in December, and the Osetra was as briney and fatty as the martini was. The best caviar I’ve ever had in my life? No - but the fact that it was available until 2am feels gamechanging in my current assessment of what a fun late night out in New York looks like for me at 26. Sitting around a table eating caviar and drinking frosted martinis can only yield the best of conversations.

What are you nyc holiday staples?

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It usually starts out with something like, “well what if we just went to a more casual restaurant instead”, and then everyone decides (the rule was no restaurants) and subsequently throws out, “well what if we went to that art cafe place?” (realizing before they even press send that you have to reserve Happy Medium like months in advance). Dear god we aren’t going uptown to a museum. It’s like 6pm and the ‘night at the Met’ ship sailed 30 minutes ago.

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This discussion, {probably happening live as the weight of drinks and dinner linger on our shoulders from Thanksgiving}, is seemingly relevant around the holidays, especially as we round the corner of January. I actually saw a video recently that posted about people who take the concept of Dry January to an extreme and refuse to order a drink to celebrate their January friend’s birthday. This was also after I announced [hungover] to my supper club community that I planned to make all events in Jan mainly ~dry…

But she really got me thinking. As someone who tends to follow rules they’ve set for themselves a little too intensely, and has ALSO made a scene about ordering seltzer water instead of wine in this exact occasion for a friend, she has a point that January could be about cutting back in a healthy way, but not taking the concept to an extreme where you can’t celebrate a friend or special occasion.

…and she rightfully implies that if you can’t have one or two drinks to break the rule to celebrate a friend, you probably have a horrible relationship with alcohol, (and I feel she’s certainly right about this take)

So let’s recenter a bit- this piece is mainly just to chat about alternate things to do in a city that typically runs on booze and good restaurants, when you want a cozy, alcohol free night. This isn’t your guide to Dry January, or trying to throw your poor Capricorn friend a watered down version of the celebration they deserve. It’s about just thinking of other creative ways to use your time.

Because I’m sure everyone had at least one relative this year say in petty tone that “there’s nothing to do in New York City other than going out to dinner and drink”, and that’ll no longer be the case after reading this….maybe…

Non-Alcoholic-Plans- For Little to No Cost

Parallel Play

Winter is the season of hobbies and mastering your personal craft. I promise I’m not trying to sound preachy, but the great indoors yields the greatest innovation, and I am a big proponent of a night with friends around the concept of parallel play. Like literally come over to my apartment and bring your project. Let’s be productive together, put on some jazz, maybe a dumb ‘falling snow’ 10 hour loop backdrop on youtube, hell, we can even add some whimsy with some hot cocoa and sprinkles. Specifically the rainbow star kind.

One of the things I struggle with in planning things with friends (and maybe this is a sign that I’m just…going off the rails? but speaking from the heart…) is the constant trade off between unplugging and being present with good company and working on a personal project, so this is my push to frame more plans around coming to a space together to create. My dream night? Sitting and writing or junk journaling in the company of , maybe getting a peak into ‘s upcoming destination as she plans, my friend Sydney working on a design of a new jacket, my friend Haley doodling some menu art.

The feeling of going to bed at night after a night of creativity and quality time couldn’t be more special. And if space is a constraint, all day cafe that does both coffee and wine until late, C Cafe or Qawah House are great spaces to yap and work. The generic “more of this in 2026” to the sentiment of parallel play.

Games!

[and we’re not talking monopoly]

I can feel all of you cringing. Like…ok we’re really out here suggesting a game night as a replacement to going out? But when was the last time you had a night in of fun, serious games. Not board games, but games like Code Names. Competitive games. It feels so good to be so temporarily serious about winning something that has no prize. I was at a birthday party recently that was a dream for this entire concept- it was a Sunday, home made Pho and a build-your-own summer roll station were on tap for the evening, and we played this game called Salad Bowl.

At first I was internally rolling my eyes when the birthday boy suggested this- I was reaching peace amidst hoisin sauce and noodles, but it ended up being the type of group game that I couldn’t get enough of. Each person rips up a piece of paper into 5 small pieces of paper (this was enough of a challenge for me, when was the last time you were forced to symmetrically rip up a piece of paper with no scissors?) and writes a random word on each.

It’s certainly fun to do with an existing friend group as ex boyfriends and inside jokes were scribbled in black ink across the shreds. The room is split in two to create two teams, and each team has a narrator that has to draw as many pieces as possible before the 60 second timer runs out. Round one is all about speaking- the narrator has to describe the word on the paper without saying the word and the team has to guess. Round two is about acting, and round 3 is about sounds. Whatever team guesses the most words and collects the most little white papers wins. The sheer tension around the number of paper scraps earned is all encompassing of the entire room for at least an hour. Phones are naturally nowhere to be found.

I left that birthday feeling nothing more than the fact that I just needed more of that exact type of fun in my life. Simple, connected fun, that’s almost sickeningly nostalgic.

Everyone bring ~one dish

Potlucks and friendsgivings are typically high-stakes in this day and age. As someone who is usually quite serious about hosting (hence the fact that I spend the majority of my free time designing tablescapes or hosting my supper club), the notion of bringing something to contribute to dinner so the host doesn’t have the full burden has been rebranded into elaborate themes, like the ‘apartment cafe or full blown supper club, which still require guests to think outside of the box.

Let’s face it, [that type] of hosting is my preferred method of hosting, because I love food styling and tablescaping (I hate that this is now a verb), but I recently hosted a soup night with a few close friends where each friend brought a soup, which I realized was still a lot of work, but we ended up probably each spending less than $50 on our respective soups and had the best time passing around each one and trying everyones creation. This night reminded me of being a kid and going to a potluck after a sporting event where there were tables and tables of good food covering a landmass of foldable plastic from every parent in the community because everyone willingly just contributed ~one dish.

And it doesn’t even have to be a theme- the host is cooking pasta, so it makes sense for me to bring a salad, another friend to bring the wine, and another friend to bring a tub of ice cream. And then everyone ends up spending around the same amount of money and it feels so do-able, yet elevated.

The: -Ok, I’m fine with some cost, I just don’t want to drink- plans

Visit a bathhouse (but not the place called Bathhouse)

I talked about my love for the Eastern European sauna concept in my newsletter about vacations you can take without leaving NYC, and I will be a forever fan for the reason that I could easily spend sunrise to sundown at one of these facilities, phone free, and completely lose track of time in the way you only can laying by the beach or a pool on vacation. The concept of reaching your flow state has become quite viral, but when I think about reaching a flow state, it’s being at Mermaid Spa or Wall Street Baths with a paper plate of pelmeni and watermelon in my lap while coming off of sauna/cold plunge round 10.

The reason I think visiting the bathhouse in a social setting is also a great NA activity is because it’s such an easy place for friends to hang out all day, off their phones, whilst doing something that makes everyone glow. I love Othership, but it’s such a costly and short reprieve (you only get 75 minutes???) from the outside world and from the iPhone, whereas other bathhouses can become your all day, all inclusive destination.

I love seeing friend groups at the baths crafting their little routine around playing a card game, then taking a dip in the pool, and then doing another round in the sauna, and then forcing one member to daringly polar plunge. It’s always the same story, but it’s a good story for a reason, and will run you about $55 for a day pass, which I think is worth every penny for the holistic hideaway you get from the hustle outside.

Go to high tea

Probably my most expensive recommendation on this list, but my girlfriends and I usually try to end the year with a holiday high tea on a Sunday afternoon. Somehow, even in our later twenties, we all manage to come dressed in festive velvet outfits and actual makeup on, covering up exhaustion from our busy jobs or potential hangovers, resetting ourselves amongst floral teapots, nutcrackers, and itty bitty cream puff sandwiches.

It certainly feels like a splurge, but the elegance of sipping darjeeling tea behind towers of tiny sandwiches made for dolls for hours and hours in an uptown hotel lobby is probably the greatest non drinking activity, that feels like a drinking activity, that one could have. The tea also seems never ending- we all show up sort of dreading the Sunday commitment and then leave so caffeinated from cups and cups and cups of tea akin to an all you can eat buffet or something…

I have done tea at The Plaza hotel, and we decided it was definitely a one time thing, but The Crosby Street Hotel is the actual winner in terms of ambience (especially for the holidays), bites, and price as the funky, bold colors and patterns give it a bit of a downtown flair that still pairs beautifully with all of the holiday decor.

Crafting Classes

I want to be very specific in the types of crafting events that I would actually pay for (and I’m sorry Happy Medium, you are not one of them). I fear when I suggest things like this, which is a sparing and occasional suggestion, it takes my friends back to a sugary, margarita mix margarita that is served at a bottomless paint and pour class, so I would only pay to craft in very specific scenarios.

Doing a charm bracelet/bag charm class at Haricot Vert for a special occasion is always a good idea- I got my beloved bag charm from here and the entire experience felt really special as you can pick from thousands and thousands of charms to craft the perfect one that is just “so you”. For me that meant a mug, a lobster, a donut, and a snake, but seeing what friends shop around and select is almost more fun. You also have the luxury of enjoying their matcha that’s usually adorned with lucky charms, sprinkles, or sparkles and is randomly incredibly high quality matcha, (which I don’t mean as a diss, we just know that cute matcha doesn’t always = good matcha) as you craft.

Recreate Collective is also always doing something incredibly interesting in the craft department with niche classes hosted by local artists like this miniature clay pizza making class, or cake decorating class from A Tiny NYC Kitchen. My insanely talented friend, Amanda who is the brains behind Tipsy and Baked also has started to host cake decorating classes, as well, which sounds like the perfect winter Friday night activity.

Brooklyn Clay Industries was also a sweet gifted evening from my boyfriend last year, and we decided to utilize a rainy Sunday to go enjoy a pottery class. Pottery is no joke- I was seemingly awful and needed the most help out of every other student in the class- but I was so damn focused for the 3 or so hours we were there. Another place where your phone and life just don’t matter outside of that room.

What are your thoughts on dry jan, alcohol, and making plans in NYC?

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I carried this narrative in my denim pockets with me throughout college and my first two years in New York. A genuine fear of colder weather waiting to be showcased on social media in posts about ways to get ahead of seasonal depression (which I do know is very real) or guides to survive the cold months. But the thing that is so fantastic about year 5 in New York is that I’ve realized the cold months of the year are my haven- almost like the very first ice bath I took last Dry January that baptized me into the one kid that would answer “winter” shyly in that same class.

Don’t worry, I realize it isn’t winter yet. The sun still shines on a crispy fall day, the leaves are still holding onto their branches for dear life, and we’re tasting pumpkin, not peppermint. But I’m here to greet the chill in the air with open arms knowing that the season of creativity and productivity has begun. This season also brings a love for red leathers, plaids, oranges, and the nostalgic smell of artificial apple cinnamon that we’ll find in hand soap (preferably from Homegoods), candles, and a seasonal dessert menu.

So with that, here are the places that kick off the celebration of cool. In both aesthetic appeal and temperature.

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1. Cafe regular

Fall feels so 90s. Being in Park Slope on a 59 and sunny afternoon with a worn in leather jacket, baggy jeans, and no makeup on other than a darker lip color that you’ve been waiting to break out is a sensation for the senses. Taste and sound really come into play when you turn left on Berkley Place and smell espresso and red leather banquettes that were recently cleaned and surrounded by stale newspaper ink in the air.

I can promise you that you will not have the best coffee of your life at Cafe Regular. The coffee is fine. You come to cafe regular for a corduroy covered day of creativity amongst murals and falling leaves if you decide to claim your seat out-front on their Parisian patio.

The best part about the day at Cafe Regular is getting to muse around the brownstones after you’re done with coffee. I honestly hate Halloween, but seeing the elaborate decorations sprawling up and down the railings of the grandest type of housing the city provides will always peak my interest. All of the mysterious lives of those who can afford to live in houses like that mixed with the everlasting childhood phenomenon that is buying plastic ghosts and goblins at the party store. A fascinating intersection.

2. Bartolo

My favorite opening of the year, and one that I wish I experienced in October instead of August. Outside of the red, patent leather seats and early 2000s fragmented tiling, I knew as soon as we sat down with our silver tray of vermouth-y martinis and felt the West 4th breeze coming in from the fully open windows that that this would be a peak experience in the comfortably chilly months of fall. Your nicest sweater keeping you snug with warmth trickling down your arms and legs from the strong cocktail you ordered.

The food is unbelievably good. I know we’ve talked on here about rankings and my mixed feelings about them, but this was nearly a perfect 10 for me. The rice with a prawn the size of our table, the octopus, the potato with a runny fried egg…all of it was indescribably decadent in a way that was far from overkill. The only thing I wouldn’t order would be the Jamon Iberico because it’s expensive and sadly didn’t taste as good as the real thing I’ve had many a time in Madrid, but every other dish was a shining star.

My new favorite dessert now lives here…like to the point that I told my boyfriend that I want this, meaning a bleu cheese cheesecake, to be my birthday cake this year above all else. It’s funky, it’s chunky, and so damn dense that the fork moves downward to cut a piece at a pace that you need a good muscle for. You’ll have no choice but to walk this one off, but you’re nestled in the best streets of the West Village to do so.

3. Ayah

Ok I try to be mindful of too much ‘new opening’ rhetoric on here, but Ayah is the fire that will keep you warm for the fall and winter months. Unlike the predecessors in this article that champion red leather, Ayah champions red velvet. Every bit of the space has paneling, tables, lighting, wallpapers, and carpets galore sourced directly from Marrakech, which happens to be my most favorite place I’ve ever traveled.

Ayah turns into a party during the later hours, but I wanted to guide you through how I enjoyed it. I went on a Sunday night, it was pouring outside, and we swapped cocktails for piping hot moroccan mint tea, which they pour dramatically from the spout of a shining silver pot. Ok fine, we got one cocktail because there was literally a martini made with goat cheese, and as you can tell by my obsession with cheese in a sweet-savory format above, this was right up my alley.

Order a tagine and the lamb shank and finish with the pistachio creme brulee that is the most acceptable form of “““““the Dubai chocolate bar”””””” out there on the market right now.

4. Musaafer

A creamy curry (and I mean, some of the best curry I’ve ever indulged in) under a flurry of candles and mirrored tiles is a cold weather delight. Musaafer is a two-pronged evening. You’ll start in the upstairs of their Tribeca palace where you’ll order the Pani Puri, which come with a flight of sauces like Tamarind and Mango to create a gusher-like, one bite experience. The lemon pepper naan, which, stick with me here, reminded me of lemon pepper wings at the local takeout spot in the most elevated way possible. Using it as my fork for the evening and scooping up every last bit of the shortrib cashew curry and butter chicken experience hit the tastebuds on the furthest corners of my tongue.

To cool off, you’ll wobble down the stairs with your fullest belly to Saaqi, their red-hot speakeasy lit by cheetah lamps and contemporary murals to sip on a cocktail from a spectacular menu founded on the flavors of coconut, tamarind, and cardamom. You won’t have any room left, but you’ll make serious note of how good all of the small plates look on the downstairs menu to incorporate an evening there in an upcoming weekend plan.

5. Pearl Box

Now that you can comfortably get a reservation to Pearl Box, I encourage you to pair your favorite fall outfit with an evening here. The ambience is very…red candy apple with those shiny red couches…the kind that squeak when you sit down and then end up being comfortable. The perfect place that belongs in my perception of what having a martini in SoHo should feel like on an early 2000s Friday night in New York City.

I can admittedly enjoy a bit of a see and be seen type of establishment from time to time, and it’s a fun place to see everyone huddling in, wearing their chicest jacket to enjoy the fiery, cosmopolitan indoors and reasonably priced caviar. (yes, I swear it’s real Caviar).

6. Bar oliver

Alright, you have about a month left of Bar Oliver to it’s fullest potential, but months and months of decadence in their indoor dining room that couldn’t be more suited to the changing of every season. While it’s still temperate, go and get a glass of vermouth on tap (or 7 like I did the other weekend…), the vermouth blanco is perfect for the warm air, while the classic will warm you up when you need a bit of a blanket.

Perch yourself at a first-come-first-serve foil top table on the side of Oliver Street and order olives and pan tomate until the sun sets when you’ll move inside and order one of their Basque style ribeyes…and more vermouth. You sort of have to buss your own table and order everything at the bar, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Honorable Mentions

1. Little Owl- Slightly on the touristy and generic side, but sit outside and have a glass of wine with your leather jacket in the afternoon and watch the leaves fall from the treelined Grove Street

2. Hoexters- Come for the plaid walls and a burger with real yellow mustard…I haven’t found such thing in New York yet. Also right on the brink of Central Park so a great place to grab lunch and go for a stroll

3. Minetta Tavern- An obvious classic with all of the burgundy tones and checkered-tiled-floors you need for a late, yappy dinner on a chilly night. The closest I’ll get to going to a club in the colder months

4. Rigor Hill Market- The perfect backdrop for a casual fall weekend breakfast on one of the quainter corners of the Tribeca modern landscape. The egg sandwich with tomato jam is one of a kind, and so is the turkey sandwich with pickled shallots.

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You’re stressed about how big you want the group to be. The restaurant you want to go to with friends (if you have even managed to come up with a restaurant) is deciding for you how many friends you can bring, and you’re feeling frantic from the thought of telling your friends about the $100 minimum per person. Does it feel cheap to host at home with Trader Joe’s charcuterie? You’re caught in the crossfires of a roof pregame at 24 and the $1,000+ price tag of renting out a private room at 27, and where the hell is the funky cake coming from and how much do those things cost?

I was feeling a bit data driven today so I decided to extract a CSV of every message sent in my newsletter groupchat and do a keyword match on “where should I go for my birthday” or other variations of such. Since I started writing this publication in January of this year, this has been asked 67 times by different subscribers because this is unanimously the most difficult recommendation one can ask for.

I think there are a few ways to host your birthday when thinking about this like a quiz on the page of a teen magazine that will ultimately lead you to a birthday celebrated at home, a birthday celebrated out, or a mix of both. Whichever option your finger lands on as you trace down the “this or that” maze, I wanted to equip you with everything you possibly need for each viable category——

You’ve chosen to celebrate at…your apartment

I’d choose a birthday in my home over any other venue ever, but I do understand that it’s not always easy in an East Village 3 bedroom…which I learned the hard way myself…but that roof your landlord told you not to go on is always a great option if your living room doesn’t have the space or you’re not friends with your roommates and don’t feel like walking on eggshells in your birthday heels.

Things to consider when picking your personal space as the venue:

1. It limits the number of people you can fit…truly for the best. No need to force a bunch of mutuals that you feel obligated to invite in your home space

2. You’ll also have to likely have to provide some food, which we’ll touch on later, but you can’t be in charge of feeding a group of 40, which is why this is the perfect time to be selective

3. Stakes will be lower for food n drank- even if your friends chip in- and there won’t be a fuss on whether the restaurant you picked is actually good

4. (The best part) is all of the control over the decor and vibe you want to curate

Step 1- Decor

If you know me, you know nothing means more to me than a tablescape. And that was some weak writing right there, but designing a tablescape is peak joy for me. Centering everything around your table- whether round, square, long, or short is such an act of community that can’t be beat by disbursed balloons and paper streamers. If you’re going to spend money on decor, spend it on the table.

Also, shaaaaameless plug, but if you ever need a birthday planner/decorator (is that even a real thing?), I will build you the tablescape of your dreams! Always feel free to message me here :)

Steps to building your birthday tablescape:

• The base: The first thing to start with is your tablecloth- your true home base that you’ll build off of to tie the entire theme together. I remember thinking my first few tablescapes sucked when all was said and done and I realized it was because I had no tablecloth and was just putting a bunch of stuff on a plastic white table… (the more colorful or printed the tablecloth, the better, in my humble opinion).

• The height: Flowers and plants are next…the tall stuff! The most affordable way to look like you have a ton of flowers is to buy one massive bouquet at the deli and then distribute the stems into a bunch of tiny glass bottles. I do not claim Amazon as the source you should be using, but you can buy a ton of them in bulk for a grossly low price. I bought a bunch at Mother of Junk in Williamsburg, which is the best place to buy used glassware in bulk for >$5 a piece.

• The lights: Candles and light of any sort are also crucial because…everything looks horrible until the candles are lit at the end. I recommend investing in a vintage candelabra, (this swan or classic vintage one on Etsy are affordable and certainly do the trick) and using this as your centerpiece. Scattering a bunch of tea candles and pillar candles around the flowers and place settings always adds volume, and if you want to take it a step further to create the ~Chez Margaux look, these cordless lamps are dazzling.

• The toppings: If you have a reasonable amount of guests coming and can swing actual place settings, I’ve found placemats add a layer of character to anchor the plates and napkins down so they aren’t floating aimlessly around the table. I usually find something that contrasts with the tablecloth so I can match the plates with the tablecloth, and then the napkins with the placemats. I got dizzy writing that, but hopefully you’re understanding my layering tactic.

Step 2- Food

It’s your birthday…so you should certainly showcase food that is very *you* even if you can’t get large quantities of it! I always preface to everyone that I’ll have things to munch on, but to never show up starving. I also think it’s reasonable to ask everyone to throw in a $20 to cover the cost of alcohol, at least.

Some of my reasonably priced staples:

• Wegmans sushi/charcuterie platters- Wegmans sushi is BUTTERY, you can’t tell me otherwise, and they have a 70 piece platter with rolls and nigiri for $110 which is unheard of in NYC. I literally get it for every event I have with one of their charcuterie boards which are also super reasonably priced

• 7th Street Burgers + Fries- Always a showstopper served on a silver platter, I feel like this is perfect for a group of 12ish, burgers are only about $5.50 each and 5-6 orders of fries will have you covered. I also think it’s a slightly unconventional spin on hosting food, everyone knows the brand, and you can eat it with your hands

• Ferdi- If you want a true coursed meal, Ferdi in the West Village is incredibly well priced for bulk servings + their vodka pasta is on my top 5 list in the city. Huge portions of Cesar salad, calamari, arancini, vodka penne, lasagna, etc all able to feed a group of 15 for under $250. Caffe Buon Gusto and Marks off Madison also have huge portions for decent prices if you’re looking for Italian fare

• Trader Joes Mini Baguettes- So cheap + cute and everyone can have their own little baguette to dip in butter, cheese, etc to minimize mess of people trying to cut a big baguette which creates crumbs galore. Save here so you can buy expensive french butter!

• Fruit!!!- Tip is to get all of your produce from Tashkent Market in the WV because their prices are incredible and grapes/figs/dragonfruit etc are such stunning table decor. I also got cured meats in bulk from here to make a prosciutto and melon appetizer and it ended up being good prosciutto (unlike cheap TJ’s prosciutto).

• Tacombi- Admittedly, I don’t love Tacombi as a dine in option, but it’s extremely affordable for a big group- I’ve gotten trays of 12 tacos before for $45 and they have a taco station for 15 that I think goes for ~250? But comes with tons of fillings, sauces, guac, chips, elote, etc etc which would go so well with a large format marg pitcher for a summer birthday

• Concepts next up for me to try- Dumplings, momos, gyoza, scallion pancakes, peking duck wraps, and empanadas!! All would work so well for finger food and feeding a larger group

Drinks

• Biiig Martini- I always make a large format martini because it is my most favorite drink, but if it wasn’t, I would never spend $$ on making this large of a batch. I bought an absinthe fountain that I use as a spout, and love making a ton of olive skewers to put over ice

• Large format spritz- Have done both hugo and aperol- the liquor is expensive but you throw in some reasonably priced (…cheap) prosecco and it’s easy to make enough to serve 12-15 with 2 or 3 bottles

• Orange Wine- Gulp Hablo forever! Affordable, yummy, big, and looks cute in my martini shaped ice bucket

• NA- I’ll also usually have a Ghia Spritz or Phony Negroni in my ice bucket, as well!

Step 3- THE CAKE!!!! (& who to get it from)

I saw a dumb article written by The Cut recently absolutely tearing creative bakers apart for what they called “ugly cakes”, but personally I want nothing BUT an ‘ugly cake’ at my birthday.

• Thea’s Treats- Thea (head baker at La Cantine) can literally create anything edible out of your wildest dreams. She made my iconiqueee sundae themed mini cakes for my birthday this year and she is working with me on some desserts for my upcoming Club Crumbs events

• Kinda Cute NYC- Leila of Kinda Cute has also made some of my most favorite cakes for my recent parties! Her mini cakes are incredible and the perfect size for a small gathering if you don’t need something huge

• Gaby Scelzo- (aka ms. ) I somehow have never actually had a Gaby Scelzo cake, but I tried one of her matcha cinnamon buns at a pop up once upon a time and was blown away. Every stunning cake she bakes and posts immediately makes it into my saves folder because I already know it tastes as good as it looks

• Emily Russell- My dear friend who needs to start selling the cakes she bakes because they are beautiful and yummy- the epitome of the over the top pink sparkly cherry cake belongs to her (and she makes the most insane large format chocolate mousse I ever did have)…you guys should DM her on IG and ask for one :)…say Maddie sent you

• Ferrane- If you’re as obsessed with princess cake as I am, they sell large sizes or individual sizes in little silver coupes

• Saint Street- Still have yet to try! But feel like their adorable $30 mini cakes would be so perfect for a small group gathering

2. You’ve chosen to celebrate at…a restaurant/bar

Alright so where are you going? Some sane options below

(All decently affordable and easy to book)

Sirrah

West Village, Perfect for groups of 8-10

I went to Sirrah during opening week and my first thought when I sat down and read the menu was- this would be fabulous for a birthday. The animal-print deco interior dripping with crystal chandeliers and long banquet tables felt like the perfect home for a group of dressed up celebrators starting a big night out. Another thing that makes it less fussy for a birthday occasion is the fact that it’s a $75 prix fix menu of salad, steak frites, fries, and dessert, so no one is left wondering what the bill will be or having anxiety over splitting the bill with someone who ordered something twice as expensive. The steak is good, the fries are better, and the cocktails are fantastic which is all you need for a big group who has a long night of partying ahead.

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Yes, to some degree- it’s hot, the air is soupy, and tourists are more numbered than cooler months, but the ease and calm of New York that can’t be achieved any other time than a ‘hot summer night, mid July,’ is sometimes a reason to stay.

I’ll also say this- if I was blessed with a summer house in the Hamptons, Nantucket, etc etc, I’d also be there the majority of my summer. Am I saying some of this out of envy for those who have access to those things? Maybe, (and those with actual houses out there usually aren’t the ones creating Instagram story aura farms)- but this is my gentle reminder that for those of us who don’t have a dedicated escape, don’t let images and rhetoric on social media or amongst those who WANT people to experience fomo…even as adults…taint all of the magic of New York in the summer.

I went up to the Bronx last weekend because I realized I had maybe been to the Bronx about 2 times in 4 years living here and felt like that was quite lame for someone who claims they love to explore other boroughs. Truthfully, I thought the images I had seen of the Charlotte Bronte villa in the Bronx were satire- a meme if you will of a place on the Italian Riviera that people were pretending to be the Bronx. Sure enough, I turned a corner from the usual bodega landscape to see a sprawling manor, sliced right in half by what felt like water more clear and Mediterranean than any water I’ve seen in the continental United States.

Every neighborhood and corner is a new world here. I’d feel so anxious if I was missing all that was offered here in these boroughs trying to escape every weekend. Maybe there will be a point in my life where I feel like I’ve covered enough physical New York City territory, but for now, I’ll spend my summer days getting off at new stops.

Trips right outside of your neighborhood

1. Brighton Beach

Pack your little tote because we’re heading to the end of the Q line to the brilliantly brutalist neighborhood of Brighton Beach, Brooklyn. Perched under the rattling of the subway are businesses lit up by the red letters of the Cyrillic alphabet serving sour cherry veriniki, Uzbek manti, and compote in little plastic cups. I happen to be dating a Russian speaker, which does make this beach town especially fun, but somewhere everyone living in the city needs to visit to try authentic Eurasian/Central Asian cuisine.

Mermaid Spa

You’ll start your day at Mermaid Spa, a bathhouse (banya) baking in steamy Russian and Turkish saunas. Unlike other bathhouses in the city (East Village I’m looking at you), spending a half-day here for $50 gets you access to multiple saunas, steam rooms, cold plunges, and jacuzzis that you can actually spread out in. Once you’re in need of a break from the arid heat, start with chilled plate of fruit with pumpernickel bread and jam that tastes extra good while sitting in a freshly cleaned towel. You’ll then order the potato and onion pelmeni (or pelmeni soup if you’ve been cold plunging) on your next break.

Tashkent Market/Saint-Petersburg Bookstore

Ok here’s where the beach part comes in- you’ll walk out of mermaid spa with a new glow and soak in all of the sea air at the very end of the boardwalk. Hop on a bike or embark on a 30 minute walk, right in the thick of Coney Island, right into the heart of Brighton Beach. If you aren’t hungry yet, pop in and out of the bookstores and grocery stores (the original Tashkent market is here) up and down Sheepshead Ave and flip through some vintage children’s books written in Russian- the Cheburashka series is my most favorite (and the dolls are so much cuter than Labubu).

Lunch at Cafe Eurasia

Late lunch will be at Cafe Eurasia with its lengthy laminated menu to include staples from Ukraine, Uzbekistan, and Georgia as they self describe as a place who “marries flavors from Eastern Europe and the Middle East”. Favorites include Tashkent salad, Manti, Samsa, Pilaff, and Shashlik. You’ll sit and slurp your Manti on a silver plastic tablecloth with foil swirls and flowers from 1950 with informercials playing on tiny televisions in muffled Russian.

Sheepshead Bay (Dinner at Sweetspot Cafe)

If you got an early start and still want to explore around into the evening, (or decided to skip the half day at the sauna), I couldn’t recommend a visit to the next neighborhood over, Sheepshead Bay, more. The water in the bay itself is an escape from anything and everything concrete, boats sail and fisherman bake in the sun to enjoy a slow Sunday. If you’re still full, take a few laps around the outside of the bay or stroll into neighborhoods that have sprawling mansions protected by hedges so sharp they could kill.

Have dinner at Sweetspot, the crown jewel of Eastern European spots in South Brooklyn, or as my boyfriend would say, “the place your Eastern European grandparents always pick for their birthday”. This is all true stuff- I’ve never not seen a large family celebration happening a few tables away. You can’t go wrong with anything on the menu, but the pelmeni, octopus, lamp chops, and ponchiki for dessert would be my line up. Ponchiki are basically Russian donuts covered in a salty-sweet caramel and fresh fruit and are something I haven’t been able to find anywhere else.

2. Rockaway Beach

How lucky am I to have a Rockaway Beach expert, , as a friend to show me the best city beach escape ever? The magic of the Rockaways really clicked as we made it to the S train leg of the trip and went right over the channel. We were greeted by squawking egrets and waves practically crashing into the subway tracks before getting off and heading straight to the bakery for morning beach fuel with our towels and bikinis under our sundresses.

Rockaway Beach Bakery

There is something incredibly nostalgic about a beach bakery. When I was a teen, I spent my summer mornings biking to the local bakery in the Outer Banks and picking up biscuits and donuts for everyone to eat- crumbs would simply get everywhere, but it never mattered because you were surrounded by sand. The BEC biscuits and croissant loaf slices at Rockaway Beach Bakery are the perfect goodies to be washed down with a dip in the Atlantic. The simplicity of the bakery’s ticking clock and open kitchen made for a well oiled machine of no fuss and lots of “oh my god this absolutely hits” after a few bites. The best place to enter the beach is if you map to the boardwalk near Rippers, which apparently has a damn good burger and classic beach-y cocktails, which I must try on my next adventure.

Connolly’s Beach Bar

It’s now reached 3pm, the end of your commitment to doing one last dip in the ocean and air drying is now complete, and my god is it time for a Pina Colada. The walk up the beach on a hot day simply can’t be done without a reward. It’s a trudge. A painful process of sandy toes and rigid denim shorts over slightly damp bathing suits. Luckily, Connolly’s, in its form of a little white dollhouse, is only a few blocks away to seek refuge. You’ll bust down the doors into frosty air conditioning to get one $10 pina colada and one $10 strawberry lemonade and share once you’ve cooled down enough to go sit on their patio in the front yard amongst locals and their surfboards.

Tacoway Beach

Ok at this point you’re tipsy and feeling the sunburn come to fruition and a fish taco with a huge side of guac is the only thing that makes sense. You’ll skip on over to Tacoway Beach, which is painted like a candyland themed Sublime festival, and bask in shade and Tajin covered cucumbers. I’m not claiming anything to be overly authentic, but Tacoway has some solid Mexican which some may say is hard to find in NYC (I’m sure we all just don’t know where to look), and I’m not sure if the ambiance adds flavor, but I can’t stop thinking about the fish tacos.

3. Red Hook

Red Hook has become super popular amongst the social media crowd, so I’m not going to pretend that anything I’m saying here is unclassified information, but I promise this specific itinerary makes for a day that feels like you’ve landed in a coastal town. It’s honestly mandatory to take the silly ferry for a few reasons- one being it is gorgeous, and two being the fact that the murray hill fraternity crowd heavily takes advantage of pregaming with the alcoholic beverages sold ON the ferry, and it’s a sight to see.

Lunch at Redhook Tavern

Ahhhh [I feel the eyerolls as all of you read this]! I told you nothing I’m saying is new information! But it is really that good! Redhook Tavern is worth your time when you can leisurely get there at 12 when they open, sit at the bar, have a spritz, wedge salad, and perfectly charred cheeseburger with a little rainbow cookie to nibble on as you head into the rest of your adventure, slightly more giggly than you came. I actually do think the food is good enough to play the Resy game, some may disagree, but you’ll be just fine arriving upon opening for lunch. Red Hook Lobster Pound and Hometown BBQ are always on-par options if you’re turned away that I always consider having a second lunch at, anyways.

Driiiiiiiinks

Ok this is where the REAL giggles will start, because it’s time for a beach bar that isn’t at the beach to make drinking alcohol in the hot sun at 2pm moderately acceptable. Your options? Strong Rope Brewery, Brooklyn Crab, or Red Hook Winery all feel quite coastal to emulate the sweaty shore bar experience to create a sunburned buzz. The best of the bunch is certainly Strong Rope due to the scenery, but Brooklyn Crab could easily be factored into the plans for the classic colada in a plastic cup with a cherry on top.

Steves Key Lime

Some steps, shopping, and chocolate covered key lime pies are essential to round out the afternoon in Red Hook. Walk through the Chelsea Garden Center if it’s the one non-food-activity (this should be coined as a category of NYC past time) that you do. It’s just up the street from some vintage shops and will be spotted from down the block due to lush blooms forming an archway that’s impossible not to walk through. The last flavor you’ll taste in Red Hook is Steves Key Lime Pie as you’ll stand in line for about 20 minutes to get a frosty-shelled chocolate key lime on a small stick. I don’t even like key lime pie, it’s usually the last dessert I’ll take a piece from on the table, but the lime is so fresh and so not icky artificial that it’s infinitely different than any other florescent version I’ve had.

I don’t recommend ending with dinner in Red Hook after a packed day, although (there are tons of options like Pitt’s and Cafe Kestrel that I’d recommend), but this is about the time of day where the mid-day spritz wears off and it’s the perfect nap time.

Other neighborhoods for a day of exploring:

1. Staten Island- No slander here! Staten Island has some incredible restaurants like Angelina’s, Royal Crown, Lee’s Tavern, and a bit of a magical air to it with some stunning homes and a very quintessential ferry ride.

2. Jackson Heights- Explore the area and visit Mariscos El Submarino, Angel, Phayul, and Lhasa Fast Food

3. Astoria- Incredible food around here, favorites are Hamido, Abuqir, and Al Asqa Bakery

4. Sunnyside- For the famous Kora Donuts and Bolivian Llama Party

5. The Bronx- Visit Charlotte Bronte Villa

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The reason I’m writing to you guys right now is because this solo moment is stinging a tiny bit. Most moments of this solo trip have been comfortable and fluid, but I’m currently handling a bartender who is begging me to also try “the best mussels in the city (?)” in addition to my mousse. I told him I already had a huge dinner, but the persistance is rea-

…Oh my god is he actually bringing me another “apertif” to try as we speak??

An hour later, I did indeed get my mousse after all. And yes, the mussels were very good, and so were the 5 different liqueurs he wanted me to try. But I ended up having one of the most cinematic nights of my trip- I befriended the other two solo travelers next to me at the bar and we shut the place down. Full of mousse and new momentos.

There really is something in the water in Paris. Or in… whatever they’re using to make a perfect cappuccino in those miniature red mugs that burn your fingers the perfect amount.

What was my logic for picking Paris as my first solo trip? Well, I had been a few times prior and I wanted a place that I could relax, move slowly, and not have a rigid itinerary stuffed with sightseeing. I knew this would be hard for me- it’s hard for me to travel somewhere and not feel like I’m learning or trying to understand the history, art, architecture- it almost felt gluttonous to simply do less of this. But, Paris is somewhere I find myself coming back to, somewhere I once stood in a sweaty crowd to see the Mona Lisa, to somewhere I now sit for an hour with my little journal and coffee and write.

Don’t get me wrong, I still learned quite a lot this time around, but most of it was about the awkward encounters you have as a solo traveler, the random emotions that come out of nowhere when you are spending so much damn time with just yourself, the flavors of incredible french cuisine that I neglected when I came here in college abroad and was still a self proclaimed picky eater (I’m pretty sure I was still seeking out Chipotle in literal Paris).

The intention in Parisian interiors and design is also something I knew I wanted to experience as someone who has gotten a little obsessed with this as of late, and my god did the Avant-Garde deliver. So, with that, here is my very very special list of funky, frivolous, and (a bit fatty) Paris gems that I’ll hold very close to me for an eternity.

The Most Dazzling Parisian Interiors

Most of which also had incredible food

1. Clown Bar

11th Arrondissement | Great for a long lunch

I went to Clown Bar after a 5am night out really just wanting an espresso, maybe a glass of wine(?), and a pastry, but was told you had to do the pre-set lunch menu and decided just to lean into it all and eat 4 courses to include plates like chickpea frites and pork belly at 11:30am. This was by far the best lunch I had, and certainly up there with my favorite meals in general. Every flavor is unexpected- just like the rainbow tiling with little clowns dancing around the bar.

2. ZAPI

2nd Arrondissement | Great for a post shop salad and spritz

I don’t think I’ve ever gasped louder than I did when I walked upstairs at Zapi to find a retro wonderland of matching wallpaper and chairs. Yes, this is somewhere I found on Instagram ages ago, but there were no tagged photos of it so I didn’t even know if this decor was real or literally generated by AI on the internet. My favorite touch was the chair that was split between the green room and the orange room who’s upholstery matched each side. My caesar + spritz combo was good fuel after a morning of shopping around- [some people online were roasting me and saying the food sucked here, take it as you will but definitely come for a cocktail.]

3. Maxim’s

8th Arrondissement | Great for a scene-y dinner or martini

Maxim’s is a quintessential Paris paradise- glamorous and feels ~burlesque, if that is such a feeling. My main tip here is to enjoy a martini and snack in the lounge upstairs, it’s just as stunning (if not more stunning) than the restaurant with its kaleidoscopes of stained glass windows and big brass butterflies fluttering around the bar. I think an actual burlesque show happens late at night in the restaurant, but I heard the food is good but not great, so the lounge is your best bet.

4. La Mediterranee

6th Arrondissement | Great for a quiet lunch to write or read

This spot was apparently *the* gathering spot for French novelists and literary figures in the late 20’s, and I feel like it’s preserved the same inquisitive charm today that it had back then. Murals cover the walls and fish lamps swim on every white tablecloth, and the folks that eat lunch there seem to make a whole afternoon out of it. I made friends with the table next to me and they told me they were having a work lunch…they had gotten through about 3 bottles of wine and got dessert and then stayed and chatted with me an hour after the restaurant closed, so whatever types of work lunches are going on there, I want to be a part of them!

5. La Fantasie

9th Arrondissement | Great for a hotel bar moment

I actually got this rec from who has impeccable taste and listed this hotel in one of her round-ups. I already had hotel plans when I saw this (and staying here is $), so my “hack” for checking out hotels I can’t afford is to have a meal or drink at them. La Fantasie’s rooftop bar is gift wrapped in pink and green stripes and has its own garden to enjoy a spritz in. The lobby bar is also worth snooping around in because it is equally as gorgeous with its patterned carpet columns.

6. Particulier Garden

9th Arrondissement (Montmartre) | Great for a spritz in the garden

This spot is the perfect end to your Montmartre afternoon! I also humiliated myself trying to find this place- it’s behind a tiny gate that I tried buzzing 10+ plus times and ended up having someone who lived down the private road let me in, so I’m not entirely sure I was even allowed to be there? But I pretended like I was, which is all that mattered to me sitting in the most beautiful garden with a spritz in hand. They also have chickens running around looking for tidbits of pastries from the tall silver towers on almost every table, so don’t be alarmed if one runs across your kitten heels like they did to mine.

7. Hotel Costes

1st Arrondissement | Great for a passionfruit martini and fries

Ok I know I keep talking about lunch spots, but truthfully, lunch is so glamorous in Paris, and it’s even more glamorous at Hotel Costes. I don’t care if it’s too touristy- it’s a total vibe to sit on red velvet under drapes of chandeliers in sunlight and have a passionfruit martini and a plate of fries.

8. Le Georges

3rd Arrondissement | Great for a post-gallery glass of wine

I visited the galleries at The Pompidou Center to see some art after shopping around the Marais neighborhood and decided to have a bite at the cafe on the very top floor. I heard they had a great view of the Eiffel Tower on the deck, but I was too interested in the hot pink chairs and chrome structures inside the restaurant. I think the waitress was confused when I asked to sit inside, but I was obsessed with the monochrome pink booths and wanted to take them in more then the skyline.

My Favorite Meals/Bites

1. Cheval d’Or

19th Arrondissement | Great for…the best meal you will have in Paris (French x Chinese fusion)

My favorite solo dining experience I’ve ever had was at Cheval d’Or in the peaceful, residential 19th. It has the most ideal counter that overlooks the kitchen with tiny gold horse (which is what the name translates to) chopstick holders lined up at each setting. The menu changes weekly, so I won’t sweat the details of each specific plate, but what I can tell you is that you should get the pre-fix menu (yes, even if it’s only for one person), because the guy next to me made the mistake of doing a-la-carte and told me he was so jealous of all of the special bites he missed out on. Standouts were the caviar toast, shrimp croque madame, Mapo tofu tortellini, and the shaved ice strawberry pavlola. I had no idea I even liked meringue until I tried it in this format.

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(At the time, I wholeheartedly believed in fairies and would write them letters and leave them in places where I thought they lived)

The multitude of small and seemingly secret greenspaces in New York are certainly not limited- in fact, certain neighborhoods have what I like to call a… fairy garden on every block. It took me a few times of actually looking up from my phone or readjusting the heavy grocery bags indenting my arms to see what I was missing. Most of these gardens seem to be maintained by the elderly who have poured their hearts and souls into creating lush escapes from our concrete surroundings. I once spoke to one of the gardeners at one of my favorites on 6th St and Ave B as she was dusting off a family of garden gnomes and she told me she was doing this for the ‘community and the creatures’.

She probably meant the native creatures of the Avenue B ecosystem, [yknow the various bugs and birds that occasionally show up in the cracks of our apartments], but something in between the lines made me think she meant something more and mystical.

So, I thought I’d have fun with this one and talk about places in New York that I feel like are straight out of a fairy tale and really lean into the whimsy and folklore.

NYC’s most whimsical spots

1. Binx

West Village

I walked past Binx on my way home a few weeks ago. It wasn’t open yet, but I could see pastels and murals reflecting onto the pavement like colored chalk on a suburban driveway. I peaked my head in and the kind host invited me in for a quick second and told me they were opening that weekend and were a sister restaurant to Moonflower (which is another whimsical favorite).

Naturally, it moved to the top of my list to try (immediately), and I soon found myself amongst the woodland creature lanterns at the bar, sipping a clementine Aperol spritz completely and totally enchanted by the murals on the walls and the butterfly cushions I was resting on. The tuna tartare and french fries combo was notably delicious and should become the next “new york happy meal”, and the kimchi fried chicken was also an unexpected hit. They just opened lovely sidewalk seating if anyone is looking to seek shelter from the same 4 places to drink outside in the West Village.

2. 6BC Botanical Garden

Alphabet City

6BC Botanical is a true, real life magic treehouse delicately nestled between Avenues B and C. You can climb right up in the treehouse, which also has lots of books to choose from (and definitely a few bugs probably living within those books) and read, bring lunch, and admire all of the blooms below. Their gardeners have done an extraordinary job making this feel like one of the safest spaces in the city, with similar charm to the famed Elizabeth Street Garden, but plenty of space to spread out and still feel like you’re in slight solitude.

The hours of the garden are very limited, only really being open to the public on weekends, but it’s the best excuse ever to get pastries and breakfast sandwiches at one of my favorite places around the corner, C&B, and sit in the garden and enjoy them (with a few spare croissant flakes for our bird friends in the garden!!)

3. Maison Premiere

Williamsburg

Maison Premiere probably has the most special backyard in all of New York, and the best part is- every single cocktail on the menu is tippy top tier to wash down their incredible raw bar selection. This secret garden is somewhere you could walk in at 4pm to get some much needed afternoon shade and spritz, and then accidentally transition into an evening of dirty martinis and blankets they kindly provide on every chair for that cool summer breeze that comes with the moon.

4. Milk and Roses

Greenpoint

Milk and Roses is stellar for those looking to WFH in a storybook for the day. There is tons of space inside what feels like a castle with floor to ceiling bookshelves and chandeliers, and outside in the garden at a wrought iron table under walls of ivy.

It almost felt a bit too good to be true to just order a $7 coffee and hang out here all day with zero interruptions, but when I asked the waitress if it was ok to just do coffee, she said “of course you can just do coffee!” in the kindest way and didn’t make me feel bad at all for having my laptop out and not ordering a full lunch (although the menu looked good). It was a bit too hot to sit outside the entire time I was there, but as soon as it cooled off a bit, I found the garden was the perfect place to switch to creative writing instead of work.

5. Saturn Road

Cobble Hill

Cobble hill alone is a fairy dream land. (Reason one being- I could probably never afford it, but other than that), everywhere you turn, you see greenery and vines climbing brownstones and hugging the tiny wine bars. Saturn road is another peaceful place to enjoy a garden setting with a laptop and strawberry milk matcha in hand. I was pleasantly surprised that my matcha had a tiny dusting of pink glitter on the top- not in a gimmicky way, but in a *celestial* way that made the matcha even more special.

Strings of lights shine here in broad daylight and make it feel like a true backyard full of family gatherings and birthday celebrations- this seems to be a special place for community gatherings on a Sunday afternoon in the neighborhood.

6. Mari Vanna

Flatiron

Mari Vanna, simply put, is made for a princess. It feels like the perfect petit palace. Other than the prim decor that feels like you’re in a royal tea parlour, you’ll also find that the food is actually really good. I know I always find myself saying phrases like that when discussing interiors like this, but the truth is, when a restaurant is pretty on the outside, the food isn’t always that good on the inside, and I do think they have solid Eastern European fare with a very good pickle and horseradish martini. Did fairy princesses drink those?

7. The Met Cloisters

Washington Heights

Ok the Met Cloisters is an actual castle. Not just something I’m saying is a castle or a palace for the fun of this newsletter. I read about the unicorn tapestry in the Cloisters in a Magic Schoolhouse book when I was like 8 years old, and then shortly after decided I had to see it for myself in New York when my family took a trip up for the weekend. Now, in my adult life, it felt inherently necessary for me to go visit the Cloisters again and feel that very same magic as I did as a child who was literally obsessed with unicorns.

This was actually the starting point of my “walk the entirety of Manhattan” with one of my best friends almost 2 years ago now. In hindsight, it was literally like 20 miles, but we had a damn blast doing it and saw so many corners of the city we otherwise wouldn’t have.

Fairy food

Food in nyc that I think was made for fairies, instead of humans

1. Pavlo Mochi- A precious, very pink Ukrainian owned mochi shop on Avenue B that has the most delicious mochi (mango flavor is the best)

2. Frozen fruit whip at Happy Zoe’s Bakery- This has now gone “viral”, but it’s truly so delicious and every color of the rainbow tastes like the specific fruit it is

3. (Everything on the menu at) Cafe DAE- Like LOOK at that matcha toast…so fairy coded

4. Tiny cake at Confectionary- There’s just no way that was made for a human

5. Saint Street Cakes- They were sold out when I went during opening weekend but everything here was made for a princess

Ok bye!!!!!!!! Hopefully you had some fun with this one and don’t take me too seriously 🧚

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….What is Club Crumbs?

Club Crumbs is a (well, club), social community, and wonderful way for those who love restaurants to make new friends! I personally think no one can have too many friends, but I’m designing this specifically for folks who:

1. Feel like they haven’t found their ~restaurant people yet and want to make new friends to dine and explore the city with

2. Probably take restaurant reservations a tiny bit more seriously than the average person and want a friend (who is equally as obsessed) to join them

3. Are maybe new to the city and simply want to expand their network and make friends! (You also do not have to be someone who recently moved to join, I just wanted to let those who DID just move know that we have a seat at the table for them)

4. Are similar to you! Everyone who wants to join will fill out their interests/what they’re looking for in new friendships so I can create the best possible experience for you

Ok cool, how do I actually join?

You may have seen me send out some feelers in the crumbs groupchat to gauge interest from the community, but I wanted to formalize the process a bit here! As of right now, we have about ~45 very cool people interested in making new friends IRL, and I’d love to start connecting as many people as possible <3

1. Fill out this little form so I can learn about what you’re looking for in finding new friends to dine with, the type of events you’re interested in, and your general interests

   1. I will likely keep the interest form open (attached above) until July 15th to collect as many preferences as possible to determine the size of the event(s). So far, it seems people really want to connect in smaller group settings at a more intimate dinner-party-like event

2. Become a paying subscriber ($6 a month). This can be done later, but in order to actually attend an event, I will have to close them off to paid subscribers only.

   1. Don’t be mad at me for this one!!!!!! Most of the cost of your membership will go to expenses related to meet-ups like food, (aperol spritzes), and other cute crumbs

How does it work once I’ve joined?

Aka…what the heck do I get if I’m paying $6 a month

1. Dinner Parties: I will take a look at your preferences and preferences of other similar new friends, and invite you all in a small group (10-20 people) to a dinner party! I am curating groups based on interests, so try to fill those out as much as possible

2. Larger community events: For those interested in meeting more people in a more casual setting, If I get enough interest, I will be hosting more informal hangouts (happy hours, etc) that you can stop by. Super low stakes, but a ~come and grab a singular drink with us~ vibe

   ---

   *I don’t want to attend events IRL- what would upgrading get me?*

3. Private matching of dining buddies: If you don’t feel comfortable attending group events, specify on your form! I’ll look for others who specify the same and privately pair you based on common interests (with your permission)

4. Guides, just for you: I love to keep as much of my content as free and accessible as possible, I think it fosters community, and I will likely never paywall the Crumbs GC. I will likely start paywalling some guides like my upcoming travel series (I can’t give away all of my Vietnam secrets for free, for example), and will allow 1 paying subscriber a month to request a guide topic for me to do a deep dive on.

5. Gifted reservations: All of the random 4 Charles drops I do (I know you guys want Corner Store, I am trying lolol) and other hard reservations will go to you guys first

6. (Hopefully merch!!!!!!!): What type of Crumbs merch would you actually like? Leave a comment here.

   1. I was thinking keychains/bag charms, hats?? and totes. I’m also looking for some help from someone more gifted than I in designing a real logo, so if anyone knows anyone, let me know!

What can I expect a dinner party to be like?

You can expect food (probably not actually cooked by me but something really delicious), wine or cocktails, and a really fun theme. No, not the type of theme where you have to come in a costume, but I take my dinner party decor extremely seriously. Venue will still be TBD, I love hosting at my place but will see how big the groups are.

I also hate that influencers get to hog all of the fun for themed brand dinners, so you can expect to feel like you’re on a Crumbs brand trip because we’re going to go all out with the silly tablescapes around here

So, as a TLDR:

1. Fill out this form if you’re interested

2. Become a paying subscriber (I promise you won’t regret it!!!!!!!!)

3. Expect an email + invitation via Partiful for a dinner party with other folks I think are similar to you

4. [If I have your permission], we’ll likely make smaller group chats for the dinner party groups so we can decide what day/time works best for everyone, the food we want, the drinks we want, and maybe get to know each-other a tiny bit more before meeting in person

Any questions or ideas? :)

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I’m 26 years old and have zero credentials toward anything interior design related, buuuut, when writing this piece, I was thinking about how a special exercise to do in your 20s is to look back on the way you decorated old spaces and the way you’re starting to decorate them now. The rooms you decorated with college roommates, the way you decorated your first New York apartment, the first sort of “big-kid” apartment you get in your late 20s…

Also, you know when you realize you’re becoming your parents? My dad and grandmother have always been the biggest collectors and have embraced shelves and shelves of trinkets from all walks of life, mismatched shapes, colors, patterns- most being secondhand scores from small antique sales or flea markets. Now, lots of new spaces are shifting to design with the same principals- try a bunch of random stuff out and see if it works. Maybe there is an art to this curation that I’ve totally missed, but the art of doing way too much has never appealed to me more.

The cool thing about spaces in New York right now is that the obsession with “clean/minimalist/barebones” that had every new 2023/2024 restaurant in a chokehold seems to slowly be phasing out, so I thought I’d put together a list of spaces that are embracing colorful chaos- from restaurants to cafes to home decor.

I also wrote about a lot of other ‘maximalist’ spots in one of my older newsletters, 10 NYC interiors that stop time, so I won’t bore you with a lot of repeats, but some of my favorite maximalist mentions there are:

1. Monsieur

2. HiLot

3. Le Bar Penelope

4. Moonflower

5. Manuela

Maximalist Dining

1. Turks Inn

Bushwick

The original location of the Turks Inn was actually not in Bushwick, but rather in Wisconsin, and many folks who study interiors for a living know about and have analyzed the wacky design of their original supper club from the 70’s that was shut down and (now plopped right into Brooklyn.)

The exterior looks like something you’d find in a strip mall in a small town- it’s theatrical and ironic backdrop for the cool kids of the neighborhood to be photographed. The flavor on the inside is cherry red with different colored glasses on every table, a massive painting of a prissy cat, and figurines lined up on shelves that I tried to investigate up close, but ended up getting too many confused looks from everyone eating there to continue doing so. The table under the cat painting is tailor made for a large group celebratory dinner (it did used to be a supper club, after all) with many many date martinis and surprisingly good food.

2. Cafe Carlyle

Upper East Side

You’ve probably gone to or have heard of Bemelman’s bar, which is also a maximalist dream, but if you can convince yourself to not wait an hour in line for a martini, and instead the path less traveled at the slight right entrance of the bar, you’ll walk down velvet stairs to find the stunning Cafe Carlyle [where you can get the same martini, btw].

I actually think the cafe, which was made for “power lunches” and fine-ish dining in the evening, might be more beautiful than the bar. This is where I actually got my inspiration to mix different color dining chairs (I also straight up copied their red-ish-orange + dark green combo), as they’re the perfect mismatch to the leopard print wallpaper.

3. Kalei cafe + gallery

Lower East Side

When I heard about Kalei opening, I expected it to be very similar to its neighbors in the LES— coffee shops with a few paintings from local artists that you can purchase for a few thousand dollars with your cold brew, but ended up being a delight of a third space.

They DO serve coffee and a few pastries, but the main offerings are a mix of vintage Ikea furniture that I could (maybe) afford, cool and colorful art I cannot for the life of me afford, a patio that looks like a chess board, and a huge roof you can relax on (I don’t think you even have to buy anything to hang here). It’s also one of those funhouse spaces that has many rooms and floors you can explore, all with different slices of the color wheel.

4. Pitt’s

Redhook

I heard someone call Pitt’s ““farmhouse chic”” on Instagram and it upset me. Yes, there is an above average amount of farm-animal-related decor, but farmhouse chic is a description for that style of southern wedding where you add a chandelier to a barn and put alfalfa in large vases on tables that are purposefully chipping in paint. Maybe because I’m from Virginia this is overly specific, but Pitt’s slogan is “A Joyful Mess”, and I’ve never agreed with a description more.

The wallpaper has carrots, there are duck lamps that illuminate bottles of wine beneath their nest, and I can guarantee that you will be watched by the pig in the chef hat on the bar as you devour your pancake soufflé. Pitt’s has exceptional food and exceptional design, something that isn’t always paired together- and you’ll leave with a good taste in your mouth and probably a gum ball from one of the many machines throughout the spot.

5. Portrait Bar

Flatiron

Portrait bar has the potential to be gimmicky, and truthfully, I was skeptical. It’s in a hotel, there are so many viral videos about it, and it’s not in a part of the city I’d go out of my way for. My mom and I ended up going because we needed a last minute reservation, they supposedly had a good burger, and I wanted a hotel-bar dirty martini (does anyone else understand what I mean by this? lol).

Both the food and the interior ended up exceeding our expectations. Every single inch of the wall is covered with a different portrait. If I had a few more martinis, I’d probably be convinced that some of these faces were starting to wink at me, but the fullness from the french onion dip and burger (that were truly stellar), took precedent over any sort of impairment as the burger certainly goes in my top 10, if not top 5.

6. Ella Funt

East Village

When Ella Funt opened a few years ago, I remember going on opening week and saying to my boyfriend over a mezcal espresso martini- this is exactly how I want my apartment to look one day. I remember seeing a headline talking about Ella Funt being the Maximalist Revival of the dining scene, specifically for the Queer community as the location was previously Club 82, one of the most historic drag clubs in the books.

The mural in the main room, painted by Marcus Jahmal, reflects in the mirrored wall on the opposite side of the room, creating a prism of reds, blues, and greens that make everyone in the restaurant (who is already sexy), even sexier. It’s romantic, it’s daring, the food is good, the drinks are better, and you should find an excuse to go to the bathroom a few times to admire the art on the wall of the first room while you wait in line.

Maximalist furniture + home

1. Showplace

Chelsea

I wandered into showplace after an hour or so at the Chelsea Flea. It was a hot day, the Flea didn’t have any hits, and I saw a few cool vases in the window of this store and figured I’d enjoy the air conditioning, if anything. The few vases in the window were an optical illusion for the massive room just up the stairs that unveiled hundreds and hundreds of pieces of furniture from estate sales.

The owner told me they try to source art-deco and postmodern maximalist pieces- pieces with some damn personality they called it, alluding to the white marble granite furniture stores that clutter Chelsea’s streets. It was the type of place that had so many things I almost had tears in my eyes, I didn’t know where to start. It’s also the type of place you should come to with a friend or a parent, someone who will stop you from stress spending on a new petit chandelier or sconce.

2. Dream Fishing Tackle

Greenpoint

Dream Fishing Tackle is so packed to the brim with items to look at, and if you take too big of a breath you might literally knock something over. It’s incredibly narrow, shelves are piled high with cherry sculptures, jaguars, swivel chairs, and the store is harshly lit with Guizini lamps. It is a true emporium of both art deco and postmodern pieces in what feels like one big yard sale, and the funny this is- they do actually sell fishing equipment.

If you have a question about the price on one of the pieces, you might have to wait a few minutes for their elderly owner to finish his cigarette or his lunch- they certainly aren’t rushing around here and have retained the feel of Polish Greenpoint before it was gentrified to the trendy epicenter it is now. The prices are high, some maybe not worth the high ticket, but they know cool Brooklyn kids™ now are willing to pay for what feels like the “gem” they just thrifted, and the prices reflect such.

He will haggle with you a bit, though, if you wanted to try and make a lower offer. If you like Picasso as much as I do, but don’t want to drop 1k on a Picasso print, they have many paintings from Peter Keil that are a similar vibe.

3. Dobbin Street

Greenpoint

Don’t get mad at me. I know everyone knows about Dobbin, but their Norman Avenue location always has the most kitschy stuff to look at. Last time I was there, they had a huge vintage ice cream cone that used to be an old piggy bank of sorts, and larger than life McDonalds fries figurine. Once you wipe away the cobwebs of the theatrical novelty pieces, they actually have some really great practical furniture that has a lot of shelving (think cool vintage backlit shelves), inexpensive art, and funky glassware FOR those shelves. I got my console table from here for $310, and it’s a postmodern dream with lots of storage and a faded pink-ish marble exterior.

4. Elpida Vintage

South Slope

Nothing about Elpida is typically affordable, but damn their seating selection is a sight to see. The reason I’m even including Elpida in this list is because it’s somewhere to go for inspo, and hell, if you have 8k to drop on a couch, then I guess you came to the right place- we’re talking red leather ribbon chairs, cobalt togo couches, and zebra boucles. It’s near prospect park, so go get a coffee, take a stroll, stop by the showroom, take photos of all of the things you’re obsessed with, and find similar items for lower prices if you can.

5. Mociun

Williamsburg

Eeeeeeverything at Mociun is maximalist heaven. This is undoubtably the spot for funky glassware, dinnerware, placemats, and candles for those that like to put together a tablescape, or like to use glassware as decor like I do. They also have giraffes, pancakes, and cats (oh my!) ceramics that are crying out to be homed on one of your shelves. No, the price for that glass is not for the set of glasses, it’s for that one glass, so don’t expect any mercy from an employee here when you ask that same question I did, but the items in here would definitely be something I’d ask for as a gift for a special occasion or as a little splurge.

6. Mother of Junk

Williamsburg

I opened my newsletter with Mother of Junk, so I felt the need to close it with Mother of Junk, as well. Every time I go here I get yelled at. The first time I went, I took a photo of the paintings that I was considering and got yelled at for that. The second time when I went back and bought a painting and asked for them to keep it there for a half of a day so I could sort out transportation, I got yelled at. But look- I SWEAR it’s very worth a paruse on a day where you aren’t hungover or exhausted and have the stamina to pick through thousands of secondhand items to find your treasure. There are few things in the store over $100, so this is a really good place to go if you’re decorating an apartment with a low budget and need to temporarily (or permanently if you find a gem) fill whitespace with some potentially ok art.

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I’d spend all of my free time wandering streets and avenues that made up the lattice of lower Manhattan, popping into boutiques and bakeries, thinking- so many new friends and characters were going to come to the doorstep of my life. How…these new friends and I would always get coffee together on a Sunday morning after a workout class, or how I’d probably find myself naturally in the Hamptons next summer with a new group of girls, laughing and drinking rose from that one place in Montauk with the damn $98 salad.

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I’m not sure what steps I thought I needed to take to make all of those dreams a reality, but I really I thought I’d be able to approach the girl next to me on the treadmill or in the laundry room.

After a few awkward and eyebrow-furrowing interactions, I learned that people don’t really do that here. If anyone ever approached me and tried to strike up a conversation, I would never think it was weird, but it isn’t common New York behavior amongst strangers. [This was also the era where it was humiliating to post anything online- the idea of being a content creator or writer was off the table, even though I knew it was secretly something I always wanted to do but the thought of people…from college…seeing me post online? Forget about it.]

Fast forward 4 years later. I was sitting at Monkey Bar last week with 3 other incredible friends, all in the food scene, all friends I met online. 4 spoons going into a shared ice cream sundae, topped with laughter and excitement toward the passion projects we were all working on. It felt like a really special moment in the timeline of uncertainty around new friendships in a new city.

I also realize that this piece is a bit different than my usual recommendations, but internet friends have shaped and fueled my love for writing on Substack and navigating New York in my 20’s. For writing about restaurants, culture, and life here. I also think in my 26th year, feeling existential and all, I’ve gained a new sense of gratitude and bravery for wanting to connect with those that love the same things I do.

My thoughts on building community in an online world

1. Spending *limited* free time correctly is so important

Part of moving to New York and trying to make new friends is doing a lot of shit you don’t want to do. For anyone that has a semi-demanding job, every second of free time you have should be spent intentionally, which is something I learned after going to many Murray Hill bars, spending $80 on tickets to see an artist I didn’t even know, (or the most haunting- going to a ‘bottomless brunch’) because a mutual friend invited me. Even if I don’t like the plan, it’s an excuse to make a new friend, right? Was what I told myself. Be a good sport.

When I felt the agony of a weekend of activities I didn’t enjoy blow by into Monday morning, I’d always tell myself that maybe I was too picky or needed to learn how to go with the flow better. To some degree, I still feel like it’s important to be flexible and spontaneous, but time is very much of the essence. At some point, this frustration led me to want to connect with people on the internet. People that loved to try new restaurants, go explore a new neighborhood for the day, sift through racks of vintage clothing and furniture. As soon as I put myself out there, I realized how badly others wanted the same thing.

2. Your DM’s should be the hottest place to be

We’re all on our damn phones putting our lives on display, so the least we can do is actually connect with others who are setting their IG-story-stage with the same backdrops; a matcha from that place you’ve been dying to try, the bar from last weekend you also loved. Everything is showbiz, (I also understand the motive behind being single and hot on your story), but if not for that, why not to attract people with similar interests?

My point is, some of my closest friends in New York started from a simple response to a story, because I think messaging others to open the conversation of, “I feel like we like all of the same shit, we should grab a drink”, is the best use of staring at a glass square for 7 hours and 30 minutes a day. If anyone thinks you’re weird for sending them a dm like that, I’d be interested to know why they’re so public about their interests and whereabouts, I forever believe no one can have too many friends.

3. Sharing a meal with a new friend is so special

This is where my piece as someone who has a more-than-average interest in restaurants comes in, but meeting a new friend over a meal is the best way to get to know someone. If it’s a restaurant or bakery that you know and love, you have the pleasure of introducing your favorite dishes to that person and interpreting how they respond when they take the first bite. If it’s somewhere you both haven’t been, you embark on the adventure of navigating a menu together. The most fun is when the new friend is married to choices that you’d never get, so you’re forced to wave the white flag and get the hummus instead of your usual tartare, but you end up loving it more than anything else you ate that night.

It’s rare that I’ve been on a new friend date over a meal and we haven’t sat there for hours and talked. There’s so many topics to explore, getting to know someone for the first time is a special feeling in life, and should be accompanied by the last sips of dessert and coffee, while you reflect on the meal and all of the things you have in common and the next fun plans you’ll make.

<3 my friends I met online <3

…And what they have to say about meeting friends online

Kaitlyn and I connected over our love of trying new restaurants almost two years ago when we decided to dm one another and get a Wednesday night omakase at Sushi on Me. (We both chuckle at our first restaurant choice knowing it’s so far from what we’d choose today). She is probably your favorite food creator on TikTok and writes incredible guides here on Substack to showcase all of the small businesses she loves, and everything she’s learned from her extensive dining adventures. She’s also one of the most genuine people I’ve ever met and I always leave dinner with her feeling so excited for more future dinners.

[Kaitlyn] on making internet friends:

““I was sort of the first to move out of my college friends and I didn’t grow up going out to eat a lot, so when I moved here I really discovered my love for restaurants and found others that also loved the food scene, as well, by slowly starting to post on my food account. Eventually, I got connected to other creators who had similar accounts and also were putting themselves out there by making content, [so it felt nice to know there was a community to connect with]. There’s also a huge drinking culture here and this has been the most incredible way for me to make friends without feeling like I have to go out to a bar or party to do so.

Favorite meal I’ve had with Kaitlyn: Foxface Natural, East Village

(AKA )

I was actually following Kathleen on Instagram for awhile (before we met in person)- her page is a literal wellness wonderland with the best recommendations for workout classes, spas, recipes, AND her favorite nyc restaurants. As a lover of ~balance (aka someone who likes self-care but also also loves to eat out), I’d reply to her stories so often that we finally decided we had to hang out in person. Our first friend date was on a Sunday night at Pranakhon, I think we were both hungover, and our most recent was over a spread at Thea Bakery that we woke up at 8am on a Sunday morning to get. We laughed as we went for a stroll around Fort Green about how happy we both were that our favorite weekend plans no longer involved hangovers, but instead, early morning bakery runs.

[Kathleen] on making internet friends:

““I think there’s something so unique about this space where you can meet people that you’d probably totally love if you met through a friend, but the “friend” is social media if that makes sense ?? It kinda breaks down a wall that we think is there (in reality it’s probably not and we should probably talk to more people that we think seem cool) and allows us to jump into a friendship. I think there’s also something to be said about how and what people post — if people are putting themselves out there online and sharing something passionately, chances are you’ll connect on more than just food because of the type of people that (generally) do this.

Favorite meal I’ve had with Kathleen: Baby Blues Luncheonette, Williamsburg

(AKA )

I read for the first time and immediately knew that Lindsay and I would be friends. Her love for exploring new neighborhoods is a deep love of mine, as well, so it was only fitting at our first meal was at Pitt’s in Redhook, which we both hopped on a few busses to get to. We agreed over our pancake soufflé that we had so much fun at dinner that night, that we had to spend an entire day together exploring as soon as possible, which is precisely what we did. A few weeks later we found ourselves in Sunnyside with an itinerary full of restaurants to try and park benches to yap on for hours. Lindsay is the kind of friend that you feel like you’ve known your whole life when you’re in her presence.

[Lindsay] on making internet friends:

““My parents always told me not to make friends on the internet, but these days I lowkey make all my friends that way…

I’ve met so many of my favorite people from the internet because it allows me to more easily connect with people by knowing that we already have stuff in common, like if we have mutuals, both have cats or have favorite spots in common. Yeah, it can be kind of silly to DM someone you’ve never met to hang out, but the worst that can happen is that they’ll say no/not answer, which I’ve experienced my fair share of tbh. But the risk is more than worth it for when you find the people you just instantly click with.

Madeline and I met through Substack and even though we’ve literally only hung out twice, I feel like we’ve been friends for so much longer. I can be extra when it comes to dining out — I like to take pictures, go to well-vetted places and don’t mind a long commute — so such a big box is checked for me when someone is on the same page with *all that.* I know when we hang out that we’ll be having fun, eating good and not feeling embarrassed about the bajillion photos we both take. I’m already looking forward to our next adventure and am always looking forward to building more community ✨

Favorite meal I’ve had with Lindsay: Bolivian Llama Party, Sunnyside

(AKA nycbutglutenfree)

Lex works for one of the hottest startups in food-tech right now and actually dm’d me from her company Instagram seeing if we’d want to work together on content. Me being curious (and also working for a startup) asked about her experience working for her company and creating content + writing a substack and we ended up having so much in common that we decided to get dinner at Virginia’s! Her content is insanely high quality and quite thoughtful, and she is the queen of all things gluten free, introducing me to some of the best spots that naturally have a ton of GF menu options (without having to ask for GF).

[Alexis] on making internet friends:

““This question got me thinking about a ton of things in life in general- there are two types of people- people that go with the flow vs. the “do-ers”, and the beauty of New York is that it’s filled with people who actually execute, which is why making friends with others who are actually executing on similar hobbies (in my case the food and beverage space) is something I think is so important. I’ve met so many people in the food space [through the internet] that are equally as passionate about food and it’s become such a natural and normal way to meet people that I don’t even think twice when dming others with similar passions.

There’s a lot of people on social media who are also so competitive, as well, so there’s always a risk of reaching out to someone that isn’t interested in getting to know a new friend, but when you do and it clicks, it’s just the most special thing, and worth putting yourself out there.

Favorite meal I’ve had with Alexis: Chada, West Village

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Here’s the thing. I’m a proud resident of the West Village (cue the eye rolls), but agreed with tidbits of what was said about how the neighborhood has lost the plot a bit. Getting a coffee at a popular spot on a Saturday morning is nothing short of a tall task.

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First, it’s about looking ‘put together’- opposite of the mismatched pajamas and mens loafers I used to wear around the East side when I lived there, then it’s about finding space on the sidewalk to put one foot in front of another amongst the crowds of people waiting to take a photograph on the infamous Carrie Bradshaw brownstone. If you’re lucky, the owner might actually peak his head out and say “this isn’t Carries house, she doesn’t live here, I do” only to get nervous laughs from groups of tourists standing right on his property.

By the time you’ve made it to the damn coffee shop, you commit to the 30+ minute line amongst everyone who is dying to try the new strawberry matcha, debate ordering food, but decide that being hungry is a more satisfying use of your time than another 30 minute wait on the other end.

I can definitely enjoy the strawberry-matcha-flavored West Village. Hell, I share all of my favorite spots with you all for a reason. How mad can I be at a line for something I said on the internet was delicious? The flavor of my West Village, though, is made up of a lot of different seasonings. Some basic bitch. Some you probably haven’t heard of. And at the end of the day, the West Village is my home. My studio here has truly seen it all— sticky floors from spills of wine hosting my very best friends, phone calls with life changing news that were cut short by the unreliable cell service, tears I couldn’t conceal from my elderly neighbors when walking into my lobby from a bad day.

We’ll call this piece a comprehensive guide to my neighborhood. My way of peeling back the flashy layers to talk about the best spots. An ode to some businesses that don’t have lines, and my opinions on the ones who do. All in all, the author of the Cut piece has the right to sound the alarm on gentrification, and jokes aside, the evolution of some of these neighborhoods into something far from what they once were is probably a very painful feeling for the native New Yorker. It’s probably similar, but rightfully more severe than the feeling of going back to your college campus or hometown 20 years later to see a new world. I empathize and hope to continue to uplift small businesses that deserve the love for the gems they are.

1. Turks and Frogs

If you CTRL+F’d the amount of times I said the 3 words Turks and Frogs in my subscriber chat when someone asked me where to grab a casual drink in the West Village, you’d probably giggle. It seems like the only recommendation I ever have for this exact scenario, but the truth is, it probably is. Drinking alcohol in the West Village is exhausting. I practically live across the street from Dante, which does make a mean martini, but any time I’ve tried to casually walk in at any time of day on any weeknight, the hostess out front looks at me with a tight-lipped smile uttering “we’re fully committed this evening”. That phrase, specifically, has come a household joke for my boyfriend and I in all scenarios (including the laundry machine being taken), because it describes the true challenge of being spontaneous amongst West Village bar scene.

With Turks and Frogs- I can bet you money (and you can hold me accountable for this in my chat as well) that there will never be a wait for a crisp glass of wine. They don’t have fancy cocktails, but the charming decor that emulates a luxury hotel in the 1920s makes up for what could be perceived as lacking momentarily. The prices are great, you can actually sit down at a table with your bottle of wine, and I can nearly guarantee a hangover because we aren’t talking top shelf or anything, but nothing that isn’t worth the warm buzz you’ll get within their red velvet walls.

2. Moonflower Wine Bar

I take back what I said about Turks and Frogs being the only decent place to grab a drink. Moonflower is the wonderland of the West Village- a place that you’d envision fairies to be munching on fairy food and sipping little potions. The reason it isn’t hard to get a reservation at Moonflower is probably because its whimsical colors don’t fit in as much with the backdrop of the WV starter pack- the clean girly aesthetic, the elevated basics, the Harvard tennis polo.

Moonflower is eccentric and has a wine list based off of zodiac signs to help quell your indecision of what to get- it would be against your fate to not get the Aries wine if you’re an Aries, right? I think I actually became a Virgo the first time I went because I wanted white wine instead of red, but that’s beside the point. A different vibe is curated here, and it’s a special one that is perfect for the crowd it attracts if you make the right turn off the beaten path of 7th Avenue South.

3. Llama San

Llama San is the sister to the fabulous Llama Inn in Brooklyn, and I’ve never understood why this place also makes for an easy walk-in. The menu is a historybook of Peruvian Nikkei cuisine which I was told by our upbeat waiter, while balancing a tray of passion fruit martinis, emerged in the early 1900s when many Japanese people migrated to Peru. Their crudo selection is an true aquarium of raw scallops, tuna, and ceviche swimming in mango and pickled sauces, which is my favorite type of selection on a warm summer night.

The dish to always order is their Iberian pork katsu served with a side of “udon verde”, which literally tastes like udon in salsa verde- it’s incredible. Maybe you’ll also allow your chopsticks to take a well earned rest on the lucky cat chopstick holder (a restaurant that knows its details) while your spoon finally takes the stage for the tres leches cake.

4. Anton’s

Told you I’d definitely be recommending some spots that were blatantly called basic for their sceney apertivo crowd on a Saturday at 5, but my Anton’s story starts with a night I thought I could walk into 4 Charles. To spoil the story, I did not get into 4 Charles that night, and was unenthusiastically improvising by walking into Anton’s, which should’ve be plan A instead of my plan B that night.

Their outdoor seating is top tier for people watching with a martini, and I love a menu that champions produce in season- think citrus salads when the city is frozen and ramps when it’s warm. The angel hair franchase is a comfort staple and made for the buttered noodle enthusiast- except covered in breadcrumbs to make you feel slightly better about your milktoast choice. The funniest part about the failed 4 Charles evening is that I asked for the dessert menu, (way too full thinking I’d only get something if it was seemingly spectacular), and ended up seeing a chocolate pie that was identical to the 4 Charles chocolate pie. The universe was doing something that night.

5. People’s

When people ask where to go out in the West Village, the speech bubble that comes out of my mouth quite literally contains “……….” because I usually have no answer. If I’m going to drink, I’m certainly not going to stand around amongst swarms of men and listen to Mr. Brightside. When People’s recently opened and became the first institution to foster that dance-y scene, it became my mission to figure out how to get a reservation here.

I also feel like I’m getting too elderly to deal with the bouncer drama, and this place definitely has elements- it is owned by Acme alum after all, but everything they’re doing warrants a little bit of fuss. I also love a night where I can get a late burger, cocktail, and dance for dessert (although their chocolate chip cookie is worth ruining your buzz for) and not have to run all around town. It’s like a theme park- all the fun and food in one. The best part of People’s is the art covering every wall in every room, which made sense because they call themselves the “downtown gallery”, and the canvases with colorful strokes and shapes bring the glitz and the glam. The Cut article also references the chaotic art scene of the West Village in the early 2000s, and how eccentric parties hosted by produces were all night affairs, and I can only imagine this place is the closest we’ll get to that world.

Top 3’s…

My other WV staples

Coffee/Tea

1. Oslo Coffee- I think I’ve mentioned Oslo as the backdrop for most of my newsletters because it truthfully is something I get every single day. The cold brew is magical and something I’ll drink black because it’s just that good.

2. Rhythm Zero- Definitely in the crossfire of the Bandit run club crowd (because it’s connected to the store), so beware if you visit on a Saturday, but the salted maple latte- half sweet- is divine.

3. Qahwah House- a Yemeni coffee/tea house that stays open super late and draws a social crowd. I hung out here a bit when I was doing dry jan and wanted to get super caffeinated at 11pm with a pot of tea and chat amongst chess players

Breakfast

1. Edith’s- the new kid on the block all the way from Brooklyn, the best breakfast wrap on planet earth lives here. Mandatory to get the Sephardi wrap and cold brew tahini slushee.

2. Daily Provisions- Nothing anyone doesn’t know, but their classic BEC on a roll with a runny egg is perfect for a morning when you’re a tiny bit hungover, but don’t need the full on bagel. Get a cruller donut too. They’re something special.

3. Hungry Llama- Ok the “viral whipped coffee” sort of tastes too much like a milkshake, but the breakfast burrito is solid and has crispy potatoes, not the weird soggy kind. It’s also right off of the West Side Highway, which I tried not to mention here, but is ideal after one of those walks.

Outdoor seating

1. Bar Pisellino- No matter how popular this place is, it will always have the best Aperol spritz in New York. I don’t know what they do to make them as good as they are, but it’s worth the line.

2. Sogno Toscano- My favorite thing about this place is that they put coffee in wine glasses. It feels so elegant and made for the afternoons you want something more than a latte in a plastic cup, but less than a spritz.

3. Jeffrey’s Grocer- Optimal outdoor spots because they close the sidewalk off and fill it up with tons of little yellow tables. It could be disguised as gimmicky, but the caviar onion dip with old bay chips after throwing back a few oysters ‘hits different’ as they say.

Hardest Tables (that are worth it)

1. 4 Charles- No explanation needed. The reason I always do reservation giveaways in the sub chat for this place, it’s comically good. I love it so much I named my cat after it.

2. Via Carota- Go for the veggies, not the pasta. The pasta is good, but there is something so special about their salads washed down with a Negroni. A 4:45 line up to eat an early dinner when they open has never seemed too silly to me, and it’s pretty much a guarantee that you’ll eat there.

3. San Sabino- Will save you a tiny bit more time and energy from trying to get into their sister, Mrs. Don Angie, but the crab ravioli in a white vodka sauce is worth waiting for.

Most Repeatable (in the best way)

1. Libertine- Casual french bistro with the best chocolate mousse in town. So easy to come here and spend $200 and order most of the menu, but also so easy to sit at the bar and order dessert and wine.

2. Le B- A place I’ve been a few times solo now, which I talk more about in my NYC Spots for Solo Dining piece, because their burger with red wine caramelized onions and dramatic pile of fries make for good companions to sit and write over a meal. Last time I was here a mom and son duo asked me if I was a food critic because I was scribbling away in my notebook between bites.

3. Tomo 21- Ok sliiiiiightly outside of the neighborhood and more toward Greenwich, but this is my favorite place to sit in with wet hair and no makeup on a Friday night when I want to devour a plate of nigiri and don’t want to order takeout, which might be too specific of a feeling but it’s such a good one.

Curious how everyone feels about the original Cut article, what spots are your favorite, and how everyone is feeling right now about the west village in general….

Leave a comment

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Bakery time happened this weekend when and I embarrassed ourselves by heading to Sunnyside queens while the sun was literally still rising to try the highly sought after Kora Donuts. We both stood in a line that wrapped around the corner and verbally agreed that neither of us had stood in a line like this in so long, but that we had both been soooo eager to try these that it seemed like a good use of our Saturday.

The short is: the donuts were insane. More on that later. Did they warrant the line? I think so, maybe. But I can’t sit around and not think about the deeper meaning behind my behavior of propelling myself onto two trains after going to bed at 1am the night before in order to enjoy something so short lived.

I think the inputs behind the equation of losing 2 hours of sleep for a pastry I’ll consume in 3 minutes or less is rooted in a few things:

1. The recent volume in which a “new bakery” opens in NYC and is infiltrating every corner crack and crevice of your social media feed

2. The ‘little sweet treat’ is the edible version of doom scrolling

The quick bursts of dopamine that come with the reward of getting that raspberry almond croissant before it sells out as your “Friday treat” (that becomes a daily treat) for a hard week (or day) at work tastes juuuuuust like TikTok.

New York is also filled with too many overachievers who are quick to capitalize on consumer behavior, which is why smart people are probably choosing to open bakeries instead of tech companies. Why build yet another addictive algorithm when you can build a croissant that’s just as addictive? The influx of new hot bakeries on your feed that you feel like you have to try creates the familiar feeling of FOMO that doom scrolling perpetuates.

Being self aware and understanding the risks of my behavior is one thing, but it doesn’t mean I won’t be visiting my favorite sweet treat institutions below. Support small businesses, right?

The best sweet treat institutions:

I also am assigning line levels to these, 1 being walk right in and 10 being radio bakery if that makes any sense.

1. Kora Donuts

🏘️ Sunnyside, Queens︱Line level: 10

I couldn’t tease you guys by talking about Kora above without giving more specifics. This Filipino owned donut shop in Sunnyside, Queens started out as one of those Instagram businesses where you had to check their stories for the weekly menu drop and you’d go to click on the link and it would crash immediately because 754 other people were also clicking on that same link.

They’ve now opened an impressive brick and mortar that has become the weekend staple of the same 754 people that I saw lined up last Saturday. Once we reached the entrance, we saw an employee with a sign that read “sold out, sorry” that we swore he’d turn around right before we entered. We somehow made it into the club and the selection was still grooving- crullers dripping with matcha glaze, oozing ube donuts, a cheesy donut, a flan donut topped with a full-on flan…the world was our oyster. Each person is allowed 5 donuts each, no repeats. We each filled our quota getting 5 different donuts to sample all of the the creative Filipino inspired flavors.

My personal favorites were the ube babka, matcha cruller, and flan, which set me up with a sugar buzz for a day of hanging out in Queens.

2. Dolly’s

🏘️ Bed-Stuy︱Line level: 3

I’ve written about the ice cream at Dolly’s before, but wanted to take a damn minute to highlight the baked good selection here because it deserves some air time. The owners Autumn and Brian are unapologetically doing things their way which is why each and every bite of what they produce brings so much feeling in addition to flavor. The sticky toffee banana bread has its own specific packaging and utensils to ensure it stays warm and gooey, which would never dare to be mixed in with the ube morning bun which is best enjoyed room temperature with a few napkins to wipe off the purple fairy dust that will surely be all over your fingers and mouth after correctly enjoying.

The essential way to enjoy Dolly’s is: stay awhile when you’re over here- go on a warm day, preferably a tiny bit hungover, sip one of their above average iced coffees, sit outside on one of their picnic tables, get a savory bite to wash down hunks of the best chocolate chip cookie in the city (that you’re randomly eating at like 10am)- I recommend the chopped cheese BEC with the hash brown on the side. Dolly’s really does it all.

3. Bạn Bè

🏘️ Cobble Hill︱Line level: 7

Bạn Bè is a Vietnamese-American bakery tucked behind a tiny unmarked royal blue window on a timid side street in Cobble Hill. One of the best weeks of my life was spent in Hanoi, Vietnam where I was ever so spoiled with Vietnamese delicacies and knew I would be seeking out such as soon as I got back to the city.

One of the reasons that the owner, Doris Hồ-Kane, opened Bạn Bè was due to the lack of Vietnamese bakeries in New York, and it since has lines down the block in all seasons of the year with folks lined up to try their honeycomb cake and tin of pastel hued cookies. Once you get up to order, everything comes right out of the walk up window (that practically looks like the window of someone’s residential brownstone), and there’s no interior. I remember being there, sipping my hot Vietnamese coffee trying to warm up while still waiting for my honeycomb cake, and decided to open my cookie tin which literally looked like a box of jewels in the winter sun. I also vividly remember my first bite of the cake- flavors of pandan laced throughout the webbed green texture, all softened by the condensed milk that I was instructed to pour on top.

4. La Cantine

🏘️ Bushwick︱Line level: 4

This is not the first time I’ve written about La Cantine, and it certainly isn’t my last. You come for the charm of what feels like a 70’s kitchenette and stay for the most whimsical confections from their head baker, Thea Gould, who is a true artist and one of the only bakers that could make me accidentally order a slice of cake with frosting at 9am with my coffee. The fun doesn’t stop at breakfast, please have dinner here and be delightfully surprised by their creative dessert options that change every single week- you can expect something along the lines of a flamingo pink rhubarb tiramisu, or an ice cream sundae cake that has no ice cream.

La Cantine is so special to me that I actually had Thea make a batch of the sundae cakes for my birthday party. I couldn’t envision myself celebrating another year of aging without eating these cakes slightly tipsy out of silver coupe glasses. And that’s why life is worth living.

5. Supermoon

🏘️ Lower East Side︱Line level: 6

I lived a few blocks away from Supermoon my first two years in the city and was never jumping up and down to go. Why? Well, I admittedly misjudged their stark minimalist interior and neon smiley face sign for something that it wasn’t- it just felt very sharp and not at all welcoming which is the usual introduction I’m looking for when checking out a new bakery. I decided to take a chance on Supermoon a few years later after I had already moved away from the eastside and regret my decision for not picking that as my home-base croissant when I was in the area…it’s a damn good one. Their menu also changes seasonally and has a few savory options- the scallion pancake croissant with a kimchi jam and focaccia pizza are two notable favorites.

When the ube ice cream sandwiches appear on the summer menu, this is a line I’ll tell you with confidence to wait in. You’ll have difficult time getting the chilling sensation of biting into their pandan ice cream between two freshly baked ube blondies out of your mind for quite a long time. I’m still getting vivid flashbacks.

6. Confectionary!

🏘️ East Village︱Line level: 2

I was lured into Confectionary on my way home from an Avea Pilates class in the East Village because I (as the behavior in this newsletter reads) wanted to reward myself with a “little sweet treat” after class on a Sunday. I didn’t do reformer lunges for nothing. The tiny cakes in the window that looked like wedding cakes made for a marriage between the Tompkins Square rats and pigeons caught my eye and were soon being devoured alongside those same rats and pigeons on a park bench. The tiny cake was so good that I had no idea it was even vegan until a week later when I went to tag the bakery on Instagram.

I also have a few close friends and family members that are vegan, so I’ve always had a roster of good vegan/dairy free places in the files of my brain ready to play when they come up to New York to visit me, and this is one I recommend to both vegan and non vegan friends- it’s really just that good.

7. COPS Donuts

🏘️ West Village︱Line level: 3

I saw troves of dudes with sunglasses and the quintessential nolita dirtbag denim walking out of a chrome colored storefront and thought it was yet another vintage store or coffee shop that would become the westside epicenter for these particular folk. As soon as I noticed that they were holding boxes of donuts I decided to make a sharp right and see if the store was giving out free food or something for an opening party. The “vintage store” turned out to be a donut shop, and not just any donut shop, a mini donut shop.

I swear the mini treat trend (Dunkin Donuts munchkins, Baked by Melissa cupcakes, …you get the point) is both genius and dangerously close to capitalizing on disordered eating, but the donuts at COPS are the perfect level of piping-hot-petit so you can try all flavors, like their sesame chili, coconut cream, and tiramisu without feeling sickly. You also get to walk right out and around town with your donuts in a pink zebra to-go bag, which probably accounts for some of the cool-kid crowd it attracts, alone.

Buzzy bakeries also worth the hype:

1. Elbow Bread- trendy, but phenomenal. Their coconut danish and cinnamon pretzel fresh out of the oven move mountains for my mental health.

2. Radio Bakery- I don’t even feel like writing about it because it’s so damn popular that people in New Zealand are messaging me on Instagram asking if they should go on their summer trip (but it is ridiculously good)

3. Hani’s- The cosmic brownie is fudgy and fantastic, I wish Sabrina Carpenter’s visit here didn’t make the lines 40x worse, but girl deserves her cinnamon roll too

4. L’Apartment 4f- Bowing down always to the cross section of their plain croissant

5. Mary O’s scones- a line level 10 place that is worth it for people who love a hot scone at a high tea

Independent bakers I love getting treats from:

1. Aimee France- I somehow scored the last strawberry matcha mini-cake from one of her pop-ups and have been an avid admirer and pop-up stalker stalker since

2. Kinda Cute Kinda Ugly- (Owned by Laila) also has precious mini cakes and made a perfect birthday cake for a friend of mine. She also does something called “sunday slices” where she pops up all over town to sell singular slices of cake and donates a certain % to local charitable efforts

Where are your favorite spots to get sweet treat dopamine?

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